Tag Archives: Zero Point

Energy Sensations – Update April 8, 2020



Stay in the center of the circle and let all things take their course ~ Tao Te Ching

(photo & quote from Jain108Academy Facebook page)

I’m temporarily in Williams, AZ, which is an hour away from the Grand Canyon and also about an hour away from Sedona.  Through some random sync’s, I found a seasonal job at a campsite that provides housing for employees.  I feel very fortunate to be here, because most businesses are shut down and most people are unable to work.  The governor of Arizona ordered the “stay at home” law about a week ago, but this campsite job is considered essential, so I’ve been lucky enough to still have a job.  It’s only 18 hours a week, but I’m grateful to have a paycheck and to be living rent-free.

I figure that I will save more money in the next couple of months and then hopefully be able to move out of the the U.S. mainland soon.  It all depends on when travel bans, mandatory quarantines and when this “stay at home” law is lifted.  I have a feeling that I’ll be able to leave in June, but at this point, I’m not sure about anything anymore.  This whole experience is so strange.  It’s so surreal…

I was guided to leave Phoenix a few weeks ago.  I had been staying at an aquaintance’s home, named Cindy, that runs an airbnb, since last August.  I’m totally convinced that she and her husband had COVID-19 back in late December (they were never tested for the virus).  Her husband had traveled out of town and when he came back home, he was sick with a cough.  It quickly turned into pneumonia-like symptoms.  After a few days, Cindy also had the cough and began to feel dizzy.  A week later, she completely lost her sense of smell and then another week later she started to have shortness of breath.

At that point, I gave Cindy Grapefruit Seed Extract for her lungs, some Oregano Oil for any possible bacterial infection and had her use Doterra’s “Breathe” essential oil.  She was already taking Vitamin C (which I would later find out was the best thing to do).  It took about a week of using all of those, when she began to very slowly feel a little better and eventually fully recovered.  Regaining her sense of smell is what took the longest.  I think it took a total of about 6 weeks from beginning to end, that her and her husband were sick but fully recovered.

At the time, I just thought they had a bad flu, so I immediately started doing the Neti Pot, spraying Colloidal Silver nasal spray, 2000 mg of Vitamin C and rotated between Grapefruit Seed Extract and Oregano Oil.  I was also diffusing Thieves Oil in my bedroom. I guess that worked, because I never got sick or had any symptoms at all despite sharing a space and having close contact interaction with Cindy daily.   I later heard that the virus lodges in the nose and sinus, so doing the Neti Pot and spraying the Colloidal Silver everyday was probably the best thing I could have done as a preventative measure.

This whole thing has been so bizarre.  I feel like I’m in a dream, like nothing is real.   The strange thing is that I feel like I’m supposed to be here in Williams.  It feels like I’m protected.  I have absolutely no fear even though the world is falling apart all around me and the public is going through the panic/hoarding phase.  Definitely feels like I’m right in the center of a storm, in my still point.

I pray that you are all doing well and are able to find comfort.  I have faith that this will lessen by the end of May to early June.  I keep thinking ” 2 months”… I guess we’ll have to wait and see…

Energy Sensations

Since the very first day of arriving to Williams, AZ, I’ve been seeing gridlines surrounding me everyday when I wake up in the morning.  Because of that, I believe I’m here to do gridwork.

I’m still seeing the cardinal cross in the middle of the gridlines.


This morning, before the gridlines appeared, I saw a black symbol in the air above me, that looks like a reese’s peanut butter cup…I’ve seen it before, years ago, but still don’t know what it means:


There has been a lot of blissful Crown activity and LOTS of anchoring out of the feet.  Sometimes the energy is pouring out of my feet so hard and so fast, that it feels like heavy particles.

I felt a new sensation between the Sacral and the Solar Plexus.  It feels like something activated there and energy was bursting out of that area.  I have no idea what that is, but it was really strong.  It happened at two separate times.

Dreams have been very vivid and a little weird.  The first week I was here in Williams, I was having dreams about people that had upset me in some way.  Everyday it was a different person and I would do Ho’oponopono when I’d wake up in the morning. Lately it’s just been random weird astral stuff and sometimes very dark with lots of bugs/insects (which tells me that it’s in the lower realms).

I’m back to eating large heavy, grounding meals.  My body seems to require a lot of fuel at the moment.

Overall, this feels like another “holding space” and I feel like I’m here to wait-it-out.  Everyone is really nice and there seems to be a good vibe at this campsite.  I’m able to have lots of alone time and it’s been really nice to be able to relax in my own space without any distractions.

For the first time in a while, I’m in a Happy space 🙂

Sending Love, Comfort and Healing to anyone who should need it






Scary Monsters


I’ve noticed a lot of fear popping up in the Spiritual community.  There seems to be a fear of predator energy, a “someone out to get you” theme going around.  What I’m referring to specifically is people rallying against certain teachers saying they’re “not of the true light” “assaulting in the astral realm” etc…  It’s almost like a modern day witch hunt.  It makes me sad to see this in the lightworker community, but at the same time I know that it’s something that these souls have agreed to play out in this lifetime.  It is the dismantling of fear.

I recognize this energy because of a scary experience that I had with a self proclaimed Toltec Sorcerer/Shaman very early-on in my awakening.  It was a scenario that played out in my life with the teacher/student theme.  In the beginning, I only knew that he was a Shaman and wouldn’t find out that he was a sorcerer until after I had agreed to be his apprentice.  I’ll briefly explain a bit of what happened…

Back in 2009, I had taken a trip to the little town of Mesilla, New Mexico, with my (ex) boyfriend.  We were driving through a little street behind the shops and when I looked over to my right, I saw a Native American man with long black hair standing on the sidewalk.  He stood there staring at me…our eyes locked.  He was dressed in all white and had a headband on his head that had rainbow colored beading on it.  As I was staring back at him, he reached his hand up to the side of his face and saluted me as he continued to stare.  I have no idea why I immediately saluted him back…it was just a reflex.

I told my boyfriend that the man had just saluted me and a second later, when I turned my head to point to him, he was gone.  We drove around again looking for him but we didn’t see him anywhere.  It made me wonder if he was really there, or just a spiritual vision/visitation.

I was searching for jobs at the time and was so intrigued by what had happened that day, that I had put in for a government job in a town close to Mesilla.  Very shortly after that, I got the job without even being interviewed!  It just fell into my lap.

To sum it up, there was a man that worked there who had a Native American background. He was an older man with gray hair and a strange white glaze over his eyes.  He told me that he had sent out a request (and did a ritual) for an apprentice to carry on his tradition.  He said he knew I was coming (spiritually) because some employees had killed a snake in the parking lot of the building and chopped its head off.  They had brought the headless snake to him to identify what type of snake it was.  In his belief system, he took that as a sign that someone was coming and because the employees didn’t respect the snake, it would be someone who would not appear to be significant.

As naïve as I was at the time, I thought that he would be my teacher and that it was “meant to be” because of the Native American man saluting me in Mesilla and because I got this job so easily.  I had no idea that this was some crazy Karma stuff that I needed to work through with this man.  Long story short, He did some stuff that led me to believe that he was trying to “steal my soul” and it was the absolute scariest thing I’ve EVER been through.  Toward the end of the whole ordeal, I went through one night of terror where the weather changed very quickly, sounded like someone was walking on my roof and the wind sounded like it was going to blow my house down.  I laid in my bed clenching my Black Tourmaline and invoking the Violet Flame! Lol  I don’t scare easily, so I knew that there were other forces at work here…There’s a very distinct feeling to it, and I will always be able to recognize that signature from now on.

I ended up quitting the job and moving back to Arizona within that week.  I still went through scary feelings for a while after I left.  It was a lot of fear to work through for me and a whole process of coming into my own power.  My closure came when one day my boyfriend had gone fishing and saw a snake in the road that had been partially run over by a car.  The snake was still alive and suffering, so he chopped its head off in an effort to end the suffering.

He brought the headless snake home and it was still moving/wiggling around.  I burnt some sage, did some Reiki and said a prayer over the snake.  When I asked the snake to forgive him and to move on to Source, the snake immediately stopped moving.  My boyfriend said he saw heat waves (life force energy) come out of the snake in that moment.  That was my symbolic closure for what I had gone through with the sorcerer.  The loop had been closed.  I felt completely free of any ties/cords/contracts after that.

But in the end it made me so much stronger and taught me not to depend on anyone to decide what I should do or to protect me.  I had a lot to learn at that point and even though he scared the crap out of me, I now realize that he was helping me to pull the strength from within myself…to stand firm in my own power.  He was a Shaman, although a bit dark (and creepy), I now recognize that he was a master teacher and I am Grateful for his lesson.


When you work through your shadows, make your dark aspects conscious, have an integration of all parts of self, there is no longer fear of something “outside” of self.

It’s an understanding so deep that there are not even words to describe the unification, the understanding of all that is.  I guess it’s like a Shamanistic view of darkness, for what it is, what it REALLY is.

Fear is a tricky thing.  It is probably the most difficult “program” to work through…so deeply embedded. When something pings that fear in our bodies, our minds can start making up all sorts of stories.  We see connections and “signs” that point toward whatever it is that we are going to create.  We pick them out, select them from many options.  It makes for an exciting story doesn’t it?

Choosing fear is a crossroads moment.  We choose…we ALWAYS have the ability to choose.  There can be signs EVERYWHERE to remind us of this:

F E A R – False Evidence Appearing Real

“Choose Love or Fear – the choice is yours”

“LOVE is all there is”

“Fears are stories we tell ourselves”

“Fear and courage are brothers”

“Fear is the prison – Love is the exit”

But yet, sometimes we still choose fear.  From what I understand, fear was originally a program for survival purposes…but it eventually evolved into something else in a world that is severely out of balance.  Just take a look at the “Horror” industry.  People use fear and being scared as entertainment.  I will admit, I do like a scary psychological thriller as entertainment once in a while.  It can be an adrenaline rush.  Since childhood, I’ve always liked twisted mind benders…it stretches the boundaries of “in the box” thinking.

It’s all a matter of perspective…

Fear can be used as a tool.  If you so choose, it can show you where there are vulnerabilities, where something is still being held that needs Love/transmuting. In this process, sometimes we need fear to kick us in the ass to get us moving again.  On my own journey, sometimes I needed something “bad” or uncomfortable to happen, to kick me out of my comfort zone…or used fear to remind me that I was much stronger than that, that I was running an old program that was still in the last throes of existence.

When you look at it from a detached observer view, without emotion involved, you can see a clearer view, for what it really is.  Fear is a reminder.

The darkness is a teacher, an old friend in agreement to show you your own light.

As the darkness envelopes the night sky, it allows you to see the brilliant flickering emanation of the stars.

A Master Teacher will “show” you and remind you where your light is…where your strength lies within…and will continue to do so, until it is unwavering and impenetrable.

It’s like “tough Love” lessons that your children have to go through.  Sometimes a parent won’t bail them out or “save” them, so that they’ll learn how to save themselves.  That is our responsibility as a parent, to teach our children how to become responsible and independent adults…and so is the role of fear.

We are evolving into Unity Consciousness.  As the old programs of separation flicker in and out of existence, we may have moments of condensed triggers…fluctuating between worlds.  It’s important, if not crucial, to stay in your Heart Center during this time.  If you’re feeling fear, take a moment to step back and detach in observer mode.  Get out of the mind and into the Heart space.

After many experiences and lessons with fear, I’ve come to the realization that nobody is trying to hurt me.  It’s only a game, a learning experience that is actually in my best interest.  Staying in my Heart has always provided me with the answers.  Finding the stillness within has always provided the space for Loving guidance.

When we truly believe and embody that knowing, the last veil of separation will slowly start to unravel…Unity Consciousness will be revealed.  There is no separation.  It is all you and it is all in Love.  Perspective is a master key…the stillness is your sanctuary…the Heart is your guide ❤


Awareness/Realization/Embodiment/Integration/Be-ing/I AM that


Bifurcation ~ Choose wisely 😉


Love ❤

❤ ❤ ❤


 ~* ❤ *~



The Blue Rose



I didn’t want to write about this yet because I don’t fully understand it, but I’m getting such a strong feeling about it that I wanted to document it anyway…I just got back from driving from the store and noticed that the car in front of me had a license plate that said “BLUROSE”, so I’ll take that as a confirmation!  So funny when that happens 🙂


In astrology, there is a Grand Sextile alignment that is to take place on July 29, 2013.  I found an article that breaks down the time frame for this alignment here:


I read that this alignment is pretty rare and also read somewhere that the last time it happened like this, was in 1945 around the time WWII ended.  In this alignment, the planets form into the shape of the Star of David, or as other people may identify with, a “Merkaba”.  There are a lot of skeptics out there regarding this alignment, so as with all info on the internet, please use discretion…You may or may not resonate with it, and either way is fine…it is to my understanding that the same events can be experienced differently in different vibrations/timelines and resonance will vary from person to person.  What do you believe in?  What are you creating?


I want to try to explain something that came into my awareness recently, having to do with this alignment, but I’m having a hard time trying to find the words.  That’s been happening to me a lot lately, because I tend to think in pictures or feelings instead of words…but I’ll give it a try…

So…..I was recently reminded of “The Blue Rose” which I first saw years ago in a movie when I was a kid (while visiting my Grandmother’s house for the summer).  The name of the movie is “The Thief of Bagdad”.  There are several versions of the movie out there, but the one I saw was released in 1961 and the star of the movie was Steve Reeves.

The Blue Rose scene from this movie can be found here:

To briefly sum it up, in this movie, a man is on a quest to find a Blue Rose to try to save a Princess.  This Blue Rose is said to be found “beyond the mystical 7 gates”.

I’ve been drawn to blue roses since my childhood and have collected things with blue roses ever since.  The energy of the Blue Rose came into my awareness recently by a feeling that I had.  I associate the Blue Rose with memories of my Grandmother. To me, memories of my Grandmother represent unconditional motherly Love and security which I’ve been feeling a very strong presence of lately.  There’s been a strong feeling of feminine energy, Love and comfort around me for a while now…and it’s weird because in the last week, I’ve had men in public, who are complete strangers, become very protective of me and want to shield me from harm…it’s really bizarre…

 I did some research on the internet as to the meaning of the Blue Rose…this is what I found:

The Blue Rose & the Shoshanayin

“Flowers have long been associated with enlightenment, and as the ancient Egyptians taught about the “Blue Lotus Retreat” – the Esssene tribe taught about “Blue Rose” healing. It is believed that both Mother Mary and Mari Magdalene were members of the Essenes, and that Mari Magdalene called her teachings “The Blue Rose”.  The teaching is to have originated from Venus, and was brought to the earth by Mother Mary. Wherever the Essenes lived,  people referred to them as “Healers”.  The word ‘Essene’ stems from the Aramaic word ‘Assaya’, which means ‘Healer’.  The Essenes were called ‘Therapeutae’, when they were in Egypt, and that is where the word ‘Therapist’ originates from.” 


“This form of healing is associated with Love and Compassion. You may have a dream or a vision of a rose, and the color may tell you which order you belong to, or which Rose you need to learn more about! The Order of the Blue Rose was considered to be a special order for only the most faithful followers of those that followed the path known as The Essene Way.  The Essenes believed that the Christ Ray is carried in both the feminine and masculine, therefore Mari Magdalene was considered to be the feminine Christ.  The Essenes also believed in receiving direct knowledge from God.  They achieved this through what is known as “The Sacred Marriage”.  It is the marriage of the male and female within.” 

The rest of the article can be found here: http://sisterhoodoftherose.homestead.com/testimonials.html

Now, when I was reading an article about the Grand Sextile written by Randy Bruner aka “Blue Cosmic Hand” (the article can be found here:

http://galacticspacebook.com/profiles/blogs/this-is-the-big-one-we-ve-all-been-waiting-for-the-grand-sextile?xg_source=facebook )

there was a part of the article that said “On the last day of the 13 moon calendar Cosmic Moon 28, July 24, 2013, the Moon moves into conjunction with Neptune. This adds the power of love from the Super Moon to the power of our highest hopes and dreams from the planet Neptune. This ends out the cycle of the 7 Mystic Moons.”  That immediately made me think of the Blue Rose “7 mystical gates”.  The 7 Mystic Moons are leading up to the Grand Sextile which some are associating with Ascension of the Earth or birth of the new Earth because of the Merkaba formation (As above, So below)…Gaiaportal also had a message about the 777 portal which can be found here:


I’ve been seeing “777” or “77” everywhere (license plates, buildings, etc…) for a few months now and even had $7.77 on my receipt the other day.  I’ve also been sensing and seeing a lot of blue energy around me lately, especially in the last few days and I’m feeling that it may have to do with the Blue Rose.  I see blue orbs and blue flashes around me all day… I do feel like I’m currently anchoring in some of this blue energy and I know I have in the past. I don’t really understand it enough to explain it properly – I apologize….

The Blue Rose, the Essenes, Mother Mary, feminine energy, Mother Earth, Merkaba, birth of the new world, 7 gates/portals…they all tie in together but I just haven’t quite found what I’m looking for to bring them all together.  I’ll write more about it if I can find the words or any new connections…





Picture of blue light captured in Sedona on 12-12-09




Love ❤

The Void Space



I meant to post this yesterday, but didn’t get around to it…

Haven’t written in a while because I’ve been at a complete stand still…definitely in a void right now.  I realized that nothing about me is familiar anymore.  I have no identity…I’ve been cleared like a clean slate.  Not sure if it’s uncomfortable because I don’t have anything to compare it to!  Everything is gone from my energy field…all preferences are gone, don’t even know what I like or don’t like anymore.  Nothing appeals to me like in a “desire” kind of way, like indulging in a favorite food or smelling a favorite scent.  I have no addictions anymore or cravings.  But it does seem kinda “Blah” and I’m not sure what to do with this yet.  I’m sure it’ll get better once I learn how to navigate.  I do feel very dizzy still, and fuzzy throughout the day…like I’m not really here.

This seems to feel like I’m being rebuilt…lots of restructuring going on…not physical like feeling the work being done, but on a consciousness level, and so many possibilities are available, I’m just taking my time to choose (I guess?). ..or maybe I won’t even choose, and it’ll all just fall into place?  Haven’t felt much physical “work” being done on me, but when I wake up in the morning, I feel a humming energy that is enveloped around my body.  When I open my eyes, I can see it…it resembles water, it’s transparent, and kinda looks like this without the blue color:




It’s like I’m immersed in an abyss of nothingness just waiting to be created into something….something to create my whole self….only I’m not choosing anything yet.

I remember reading an article about “The Void” space you go into when you die…I tried to find it, but wasn’t able to track it down…wish I could find it so I could include it in this post.  The article said something along the lines of if you can wait and not rush to choose anything right away out of fear, then you would eventually manifest/create the Heavenly realms.  It suggested that when we die, most people panic and are in a state of confusion searching for any “white light” to get out of the darkness and stillness…they search for something familiar to them to find comfort because they are uncomfortable and lonely in the darkness and Peacefulness of the void (basically they are searching for something outside of themselves)…but it said that rushing into that will usually pull them into another reincarnation realm and they’ll start the whole process all over again. I strongly resonate with that article. How can you create Heaven within yourself if you’re always looking for something outside of yourself for comfort?  Patience and detachment are key.  Not searching for anything familiar will allow something new to bloom.  So maybe that’s what I’m doing?

A theme that I also seem to be experiencing right now is two extreme polarities cancelling each other out…really can’t put it into words, but there is some mental work being done on me that involves bringing opposites together and neutralizing them…adding to more of the “blank slate” feeling I’ve been having…I feel that positive and empowering affirmations will be the next step once I’m done with this phase, but will have to be patient and wait until this part is completed.

Well, so far manifesting in everyday life is working for me…like surprisingly quick!  There were 3 things that I really felt strongly (emotionally) over the past few months that should happen, and they all happened last week.  It caught me by surprise and I had to really step back and ask myself “Did I really do that, was it me that manifested that?”  It helped to remind me that I really have to monitor my thoughts and use a lot of discipline when it comes to thinking and feeling while in an emotional state…and I have to keep free will in mind, and take other’s paths into consideration.  That’s even more of a reason to leave Phoenix and move away from my boyfriend. I’ve postponed the move until March because I’m getting a strong message to stay until then.

People are super nice to me, to the point that it’s really weird and I don’t know how to react.  Been feeling a little nudge to get in contact with certain family members again.  Just called one of my cousins and he was SO happy to hear from me, it was so refreshing.  I feel so Loved… Yes, things are definitely changing on a more positive note.  Becoming aware of the power that you have and using it responsibly is a wonderful feeling.  I’ve been trusted with something so delicate and so guarded and protected.  I vow to use it wisely…for the Highest of Good for all :-).



**After writing this post, I found a Karen Bishop post on Feb. 15 that is very helpful in understanding this phase that some of us may be experiencing at the moment:



**And on Feb. 22nd, I found this post by Maureen Moss:



.** I found an article similar to the one I was referring to above.  This one is from Tom Kenyon channeling the Hathors.  In it he says:

As with the other two transition states of consciousness, the death realm has a void point, and its dominant features are stillness (silence) and darkness. All possibilities exist within the Void, but no actuality is in existence. It is like the acorn of an oak tree. The oak, the giant tree itself, is potentially within the acorn, but it does not yet exist.

So when you find yourself in the Void, which you will recognize by the fact that you are utterly alone in darkness and utter stillness, know that you are in the central nexus of your creative powers.

What you choose to create next will determine the course of your destiny and what worlds you will inhabit or realms of existence you will reside in. This is a critical juncture.

Many persons frightened by the darkness move to the light prematurely. And what they do not realize is that in their yearning they create the light. A portal opens before them, like a tunnel, and they can move into this tunnel of light, encountering those they have known before, thereby entering back into embodiment or other vibratory realms of existence without having fully understood the consequences. This is certainly one option open to you, and one that is often taken.

Another option, however, is to remain at the void point, residing in the Void itself, becoming aware of your Self as pure consciousness—transcendent to all phenomena.

If you reside in this state of awareness long enough without the need to create something, you will discover your identity as the great I Am. And from this point of awareness you can choose the circumstances of your embodiment. You can choose the worlds you will inhabit or the realms of consciousness where you will reside.

This latter method gives you the greatest opportunities, though it is the most difficult for most people. And the reason for this difficulty has to do with the fact that most humans find it uncomfortable to not have a body. The yearning for a body and the experience of the material world often draws a person from the Void prematurely.

The whole post can be found here: