Tag Archives: Shadow integration

Taming The Demon

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darkness

You become responsible, forever, for what you have tamed – Antoine de Saint-Exupery – The Little Prince

“Taming the Demon”

If I would have read a title like this 6 years ago, I would probably feel a knot in my stomach while reading it. I had to ask myself why such things, words, or sometimes numbers, make me feel uncomfortable. What I discovered was that it was all due to programming from society, the people around me and their view of good and bad, light and dark…but what do I really feel from my own experience?

I was originally going to name this blog “Taming the Cyclops” but decided to change it…This posting is about a dream that I had that seemed to be the beginning of several dreams over the last few years that  all revealed the same message.

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About 6 years ago I had a strange dream that helped to change my view of demons, monsters and nightmares. In the dream I was visiting my younger cousin Greg at his home. We ended up going to the shopping mall to have some lunch. I placed my personal belongings on a table in the food court, to show people that we were going to sit there and to save the table for us.

I went to order food and when I came back to the table, there were 3 men sitting in the space I had chosen. They appeared to be laborers or construction workers.  The men carelessly put their lunch right on top of my personal belongings, just totally disregarding that someone else might be sitting there.

I told one of the men that we were going to sit there and explained why all of my stuff was on the table. He ignored me and continued to eat. After a while of trying to get a response from him, I proceeded to gather my belongings from the table and in the process, had to move his food to get my stuff from under it. The man was FURIOUS…he quickly and forcefully stood up in front of me and began to yell and scream in my face.  As he was screaming, he began to morph into a huge Cyclops monster.

cyclops

The man’s body expanded as he grew taller and more muscular.  He began to aggressively growl and foam at the mouth and his teeth were razor sharp and glaring like a wild animal.  I could feel the humidity of his hot breath on my face.

To my surprise, I was not afraid. I stood right up to him and stared into his single eye. I began to forcefully yell at him and told him that he was being absolutely ridiculous…that he was letting his anger turn him into a demon. “STOP IT NOW!” …”DON’T YOU REALIZE THAT YOU’RE ALLOWING YOUR EMOTIONS TO CONTROL YOU?!”…”YOUR EMOTIONS ARE TURNING YOU INTO A MONSTER” …”LOOK AT YOURSELF!!!”

As I was shouting these words, I could feel a release from my core, there was such power behind it. My words seemed to slowly calm him down and he just continued to breathe heavily while I stared into his eye. My staring into his eye seemed to have a hypnotizing effect on him. Even though he calmed down, he didn’t turn back into a man, he stayed as a Cyclops, but his anger slowly dissipated. I was somehow able to tame him.

This is where the dream is kind of hazy…I don’t remember parts of it.  The dream somehow shifted to the Cyclops giving us a ride home. I’m not sure how that came about, but I somehow influenced him to do it.

pickuptruck

He had an old beat-up white pick-up truck and we sat in the back of the truck while he drove us home.

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Outside of the mall, it looked like a small Middle Eastern city and I could feel the dry heat of the desert air.  The air was thick and dusty and I could feel the warmth of the sun shining down on my skin.

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town

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We drove past a small marketplace of old buildings, shades of turquoise and blue, paint peeling off of the tattered walls. I could hear Arabic type music playing in the background.

As the Cyclops continued to drive us home, he kept slamming on his brakes and sharply turning corners so that we would tumble around in the back of the truck…he thought it was HILARIOUS and I could hear his deep belly laugh as he watched us with his single eye in the rear view mirror. I just told my cousin to ignore him and that we’d be home soon….

The Cyclops kept laughing so hard, such a joyful laugh, that it was contagious…It triggered my own laughter and as I began to laugh, then my cousin started to laugh. My cousin and I tumbling around in the back of the truck laughing hysterically…then I woke up…

Later when I thought about the dream, I realized that it was showing me that these monsters are created by ourselves…they are the creation of our own anger and emotions. When I told the Cyclops to stop being so ridiculous, he seemed to snap out of his rage and calm down…his behavior was now in his awareness…

At the end of the dream when we were all laughing, it showed me that I had brought joy to this monster that at one point wanted to rip me to shreds. By taming him and not trying to destroy or kill him, I had somehow healed a part of myself by bringing awareness to it and not trying to fight against it.

Something inside of me has changed as a result of this light shone in the deeply hidden darkness…there is a sense of unconditional Love and understanding for even the darkest aspects…realizing that it’s not an outside force, but merely a part of myself that just needed acknowledgment, acceptance for what it is, and forgiveness…

In resolution and graduation from the astral realm, we will take parts of ourselves that are not perfect…It’s the acknowledgement and acceptance of these parts of self that will allow the healing and release to the higher realms.  In my personal experience, we do not leave them behind…

We merely transcend them with Loving/Freeing recognition.

alchemy

LOVE ❤

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Clearing The Shadows

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Be-still___

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I’ve been immersed in a deep stillness for the past few weeks.  It was difficult to put anything into words so I wasn’t able to write anything for quite a while.  This seems to be a new level of peaceful calm that I’ve never experienced before…it’s even difficult to put into words what it feels like.

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October 8, 2013

Last night something strange happened…when I was trying to go to sleep, I found that I couldn’t actually fall asleep.  I was in some type of “in between” state of consciousness where I was still aware that I was in my bedroom, but I was also somewhere else…almost like I was expanded everywhere.  I kept slipping out of this consciousness because I was feeling a strong pulling sensation on my solar plexus, but I’d immediately fall back into this in between state.  I kept hearing something moving around in the room with me.  I felt like I was in an extreme state of heightened awareness…almost like I could hear things for miles.

This has happened a few times before, but it usually lasts for many hours, sometimes an entire 8 hours worth of sleep time.  When it’s happened in the past, I felt like I didn’t get any sleep at all.  This time I was able to finally fall asleep and have a dream.  This dream was of me clearing shadows.  It was like there were many shadows that were crossing over and I was supervising them.

shadows

I get the feeling that they were agreeing to be transmuted/transcended.  It wasn’t a fight or a struggle, they were actually surrendering because their work was done and their purpose had been served.  It was not about being defeated, it was about being finished with their purpose.

desert

At the end of the dream, I was in the middle of nowhere in a huge desert.  It looked like New Mexico or Arizona.  It was overcast and dark, kind of gloomy like the lower astral realm.

I was witnessing tall black shadow figures walking off of the land of this huge desert.  They were voluntarily leaving so that they could be transmuted.  There were so many of them coming out of the ground and I got the feeling that they had occupied the land for many generations.  They were the creations of some very dark work…but were now free to leave from the cycle they had been stuck in.  They were not fleeing; they were just walking calmly in slow motion, all of them walking toward the same direction.

The word that I got from witnessing these shadows was “Transcendence”.   The cycle they had served for so long had now come to an end.   It was a mutual agreement and the purpose that they had served for so long had now come to an end…It was done very peacefully…no judgment…I just understood that they were playing a role.

I’m not sure what this all means…Was I witnessing my own clearing or was it something on a much larger scale? If it is larger, maybe I’ll read something about it soon (**see links below)…but I do feel like it’s been done on a very large scale and some very deeply rooted darkness has now been liberated…It’s so strange because I also felt (and still feel) such a peaceful calm around me.  I would think that dealing with such darkness would cause maybe some agitation or nervousness (as it has in the past for me), but I didn’t experience anything other than Peace and balance throughout the whole process.  It was actually very beautiful with a touch of sadness…It’s almost like I felt sorry for them…or maybe I was just picking up on the melancholy vibe?

It might sound corny, but I kept hearing the song “The Air That I Breathe” by the Hollies when I woke from the dream…it keeps playing in my head when I think of the dream now.  I can’t help but laugh…it seems silly to me…

The song is here:

I wrote this blog on October 8th, but felt that I shouldn’t post it right away…I needed some time to settle and see how I felt about it over a period of time…What has happened over the last week is that I came to a better understanding of what “roles” are played in this game of illusion.  I’ve come to a deeper understanding of light and dark.  For the first time, I truly understand (feel) that there is no separation.  It’s very difficult to put into words.

I can’t seem to get that feeling of “sadness” or “melancholy” from the shadow figures out of my mind (Heart)…it’s been continuously playing over and over again and the feeling has stayed with me.  The feeling is settling with me, but it’s changing and getting lighter as each day passes. Maybe it’s integrating?  I don’t know… I apologize for not being able to explain it better since it’s a new feeling and experience for me.  The only thing I can say for certain is that I have a whole new respect for the roles that the shadows have played in the illusion.  The masks have been removed and what I see is a familiar face.

It reminds me of the end of the movie “The Game” when Michael Douglas finds out that everything he had been through was just a game…everyone was just playing a role and he was so relieved that everyone was really his friend not his enemy.

Movie scene can be found here:

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I’ve reached a whole new level of understanding and it feels very good.  The more layers I work through on the inside, the more veils are lifted on the outside. Awareness and realization on a whole new level… My views of this world and everything in it are rapidly changing at an accelerated pace…a little more every day…I’m starting to remember 😉

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Shine

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**After posting this blog, I found an article from Lisa Renee that she posted on October 28, 2013…all I can say is WOW…she explains everything that I witnessed in my lucid dream…WOW – what a sync !… The article can be found here: http://www.energeticsynthesis.com/index.php/resource-tools/blog-timeline-shift/2308-new-physicalization-begins

**I also found an article from Sandra Walter posted on October 25th, 2013.  I really resonated with what she wrote and it seems to tie in with what I’ve written.  The article can be found here: http://www.sandrawalter.com/the-silence-the-stream-the-fractal/#comments

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Love ❤

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