Tag Archives: Imprints

Awareness And Release Of Trauma

Standard

~ . Some fear the firesome simply become it . ~

It’s been a while since I’ve written.  Over the past year, I’ve had a series of events happen that have been totally and completely life changing/shifting.  I’ll start with one that introduced me to a new healing modality that I had never heard of before.  This modality has offered exposure and healing for deep down trauma like no other that I’ve ever experienced. I haven’t read anything online about others having this same type of effect from the modality, but I’ll share with you, the profound effect I’ve had as a result.

In May of last year (2018), I got a temporary job with the U.S. Post Office in Phoenix, Arizona.  I left my comfort zone job in remote Utah to take the new job in Arizona. I already knew that it was time for me to leave my “holding spot” and a series of events served as a catalyst for the change… I didn’t have anywhere to stay in AZ since my ex-boyfriend’s house was no longer available, so I started to search the AIRBNB website.  There was a listing that I totally resonated with and I made a request to rent a room for at least a month to get me started. After the first phone conversation with the owner, we both felt that there was a connection and she said it would be okay to rent the room on a monthly basis.

Long story short, the owner is a healer/energy worker and a very talented  artist. She is probably one of the sweetest souls I’ve ever met.  She just radiates a very calming and Loving energy.  She lives in a beautiful home nestled inside South Mountain right near the border of Tempe, AZ. She has a telepathic energy transmuting pitbull and a magical Goddess cat lol…. After a couple of weeks of staying in the home, she casually mentioned “Let me know when you want me to run your bars”….and I was like “Huh???”

I had no idea what she meant by that. What does “run your bars” mean? It ended up that she remembers a full conversation that we had about her doing the Access Consciousness healing modality on me, which focuses on touch points on your head that they call “bars”.  In this conversation, I had agreed to have it done.

We actually didn’t have the conversation that she remembered, but I trusted that she probably had it in a dream or in another realm. Since this has happened to me with other people remembering full conversations with me that never took place, I just went with it.  Either way, I felt good about it, so I agreed (again) lol.

The treatment, I’m guessing, takes approximately 1 hr on average, but you can go longer if needed.  We ended up going for almost 2 hours. I could feel the energy on my head like a Reiki treatment, only, the different bars would cause different sensations in different parts of my body when engaged.  When she got to the “Implant bar” behind the ears, I started to have visions and started to hear things, and to smell things…it was really bizarre the first time that this happened.

The first thing that I heard was pounding, very LOUD pounding. I got the message that this pounding was coming from underground.  I tuned into it and started to smell damp cold Earth, it was very dark. I saw a weathered turquoise wooden box and realized that I was trapped in this box underground.

(It was kinda creepy finding this picture online because it’s the exact same color that I saw..Yikes!)

I was the one who was making the pounding noise as I was frantically hitting and kicking the lid of the wooden box in hopes of somebody hearing my desperate screams for help…I was buried alive underground and left to suffocate and die.

After that vision had passed and played out, I started to smell something burning.  Then I felt extreme heat on the right side of my face. I saw fire. The smell began to change and I realized that it was the smell of burning flesh.  The heat on the side of my face was from my flesh burning in the flames. I was a female in that lifetime and I was being burned at the stake.

After we were done, I continued to have a very active electrical sensation on the right side of my face for several hours.  It’s like my face was repairing on a grid level after I had released the memory.

So I ended up leaving Arizona after a month because the job didn’t work out (I would not recommend EVER working for the Post Office lol) and I was being called to California to deal with creepy ancestral crap involving the paternal side of my family (which is a living nightmare I’ll write about later). When I was done with this other work, I ended up returning to her home in Arizona after a year had passed, and was back at her house again in May of this year, once again, for only a month.

This time we did an energy exchange for each other.  She would run my bars one day and I would do Reiki and other energy work on her at a different time, in exchange.  The next time she ran my bars, and when she got to the “implant bar”, I had A vision of “blackface”.

It was floating in the air like a photograph.  When I tuned into the energy to understand what that meant, I saw myself as an African male standing next to a tree.  I was a slave. I was hanged on that tree and then they lit me on fire. That was a very difficult implant/imprint to remove.  I had to really focus on removing it for quite a while. It took some time, but toward the end, I saw and felt a string (maybe a rope?) unravel in the right side of my jaw.  It was all intertwined and deeply embedded in the bone. It unraveled from my jaw bone, then down my neck, through my shoulder, my right arm and then it was forcefully being pulled out of my right hand.  It was REALLY long, so it took a while to pull the entire string/rope out. I have a feeling that this string/rope is some type of implant regarding hanging. Now that it’s in awareness, it should be easier to clear on other people.  That implant was a sneaky one that’s hard to detect. (**Also, in my personal experience, this implant may also be linked to suicidal thoughts having to do with hanging oneself, which I’ll also write about later).

The next and last time she ran my bars and got to the implant bar, I had a vision of a Knight’s Templar male.  First I saw the symbol, then I saw the sword.

In part of the vision, the sword was placed in my spine (energetically).  The top handle part was where my shoulders were, and the length of the sword pointing downward was in my spine.  I realized that the sword was energetically embedded in my spine when I took the Templar oath. I saw myself as a Knight kneeling.

I felt the strong sensation of loyalty and sense of purpose that I had invoked. It was overwhelmingly strong.  I knew that the oath was affecting my life now, that despite doing numerous vow and contract release techniques, that the sword had still been embedded in my spine on a different level. That one was also difficult to remove because there was such a strong sense of loyalty. It’s almost like a guilt feeling that I’ve abandoned a cause that I believed in so deeply and felt so passionate about. I had the same guilt type feeling in releasing Bodhisattva vows as well…But what I’ve come to realize is that in believing so passionately that we need to keep that vow, in attachment to the belief that we need to save someone or something, we’re actually creating it and keeping the need alive, we’re feeding it energy.  Once we release the belief in that need, in that vow, then the actual need for saving – the reflection of that in this world – will be released. That was a big realization for me. Quite profound…

So after these experiences with this type of trauma/death release, it was brought to my attention that for me personally, this was connected with “bullying” in my life. These deaths that I had experienced in other lifetimes have imprinted a type of trauma/wound that was reflecting/attracting bullying energy.  People being mean, people judging me for being different, people not liking me and making fun of me….this was all connected to the trauma of being condemned to death for being different in other lifetimes or for being a threat to their power over other people.

Maybe we all have such implants/imprints in consciousness;  being burned at the stake for being a witch or a healer, buried alive for being a threat in exposing the truth, Knights Templar destroyed by King Phillip’s command, beheaded for various reasons from various Royalty figures, lynched, starved to death, gassed, stoned, drowned because of our race or the color of our skin.

I’m sure I have more to clear and will definitely continue with my bars sessions.  Although it’s very sad and can be painful to tap into those energies, it’s also very interesting to see where each one connects with what is currently going on in this lifetime, what triggers are related to the particular imprint in consciousness.

But now that it’s in awareness, it should be easier to clear on myself and on others.  I am very Grateful

 ………….~Still We Rise~

Ignition

Standard

Godself

Godself ~ Painting by Alex Grey

“Every person is an aspect of one Godself” – Alex Grey

July 29, 2016

I really haven’t felt like posting anything for quite a while.  I’ve been writing in my journal, but just not feeling like sharing, I guess…Something happened yesterday that really affected me and I feel like it was a pretty big shift, so I felt inspired to write about it.

Yesterday something happened that drew so much energy and emotion, that it felt like it combusted.  It started while I was driving home from the store and I got this realization that hit me like a ton of bricks…I realized that I am what we call “God”…I chose my life before I was even born…I am a facet of the Creator, and if I am the Creator, then why in the world am I agreeing to play this stupid game any longer? It actually kind of pissed me off – lol

I’ve always known this to be true, but this realization was different…it’s like something awakened inside of me and I actually felt it in every cell in my body.  I guess I can say that it’s like I embodied/integrated the realization and it started triggering anger…anger because I was blindly participating in something that I didn’t need to be a part of anymore.  Everything started to flash in my mind and I was suddenly seeing my entire life.

It got me to thinking that I have experienced quite a bit of suffering in this lifetime; physical abuse, family issues, homelessness, birth defects, health problems, chronic allergies, EMF hypersensitivity etc…and although I’ve evolved throughout the years, I’m still experiencing difficulty with most of those issues.

So why am I agreeing to this crap?!  Why am I agreeing to participate day-after-day-after-day to allow this illusion to continue to exist?

I started to question everything; what about karma? Isn’t that like a set of rules made up by another person?  Who decided that humans would have to participate in karma?  And what about genetics?  My family has a long list of health issues so I will most likely have them too?  Who decided that? (my doctor told me the other day that I will most likely have osteoporosis because it runs in my family – Huh?! )  What if I don’t agree to that?  What if I know and believe that I can and will change that?  The more questions flooded in, the more agitated I became…but I just allowed myself to delve deep into these feelings and bring them to the surface.

When I got home, I waited until everyone left and I was home alone…then I looked into the mirror, looked directly into my eyes and began to yell.

Reflection

I started with “Hey YOU…I’m talking to YOU, not some outside source or a God sitting on a throne in some distant place, I’m talking to YOU…the one who created this life”.

I yelled to myself that since “I” was responsible for the circumstances in my life, since I chose all of this before I was even born, then “I” was putting my foot down and refusing to participate any longer.

I was angry.  WHO would choose this crap?!  Why would anyone or anything choose suffering or set it up so that a helpless child HAS TO suffer from the very start of their life with circumstances beyond their control?  “I” chose this?

I let it all out and demanded that things change in my life and environment or I will “opt-out’ because I’m SO worn out…I said I was tired and beat-up and physically/emotionally exhausted…and I refused to participate in this stupid game any longer.

I had done the work, handed over full trust to this process, activated dormant chakras, forgiven, cleared, released, cleared again and again, embodied, integrated, anchored, transformed, transmuted, transfigured, transcended…ALL of the T’s….but after all of that, I still had pain and suffering, and now I’d hit rock bottom.  I was consciously putting my foot down.  NO MORE PAIN AND SUFFERING.

After screaming at my reflection and letting it all out, I felt so much better.  The rush of emotion seemed to clear and I was able to calm down.  It felt like a huge release of pressure from my core…like a volcano erupting.  A while later, once I became calm again and was able to get centered, I tuned in to what I had just experienced.  I was able to understand what had happened.

I realized that my emotional outburst was a huge shift in my energetic field and a substantial release…another tier in the awakening stratum (I didn’t even know what the word stratum meant, but it popped into my mind) .  Revolutionary anger is always a sign of change in the making….lol   And that is a reflection in the outer world today…and now, a revolution within my own body as well…Ahhh…

This was a huge catalyst that was igniting a transformation from within.  The images that I received were of flames combusting and igniting other flames.

flame

This is the beginning of many coming into their own true power (consciously).  Not the kind of power as in wars and control, but the exact opposite of that.  This is the uprising of Unconditional Love, protection and security…the security to fully awaken with full support and understanding.  The security to release all of the programming.

Sometimes it’s not that we need protection from the “bad guys”(illusions)….sometimes we need protection from ourselves(creators)…from our programming of self sabotage and actions due to habit…from our belief systems, from societal conditioning.  It just takes one person to guide another through that and to bring it to awareness…to ignite the flame.

~***~

Today there is a new sense of confidence, of being stronger and a “knowing” that all is in the process of transformation.  Change is inevitable…I choose to believe that things will change, that in that moment of looking in the mirror, they have already been changed.

So…”Hey YOU, the one that created this life…I choose CHANGE.”

.

And so it is 🙂

reflection

                Macy Kate Band -“Imagine Dragons – Radioactive” cover (Click HERE for lyrics)

.

**After writing this, I found some posts that were a confirmation to this recent experience…awesome sync! :

Posted July 30th-Ronna Herman – Open Letter to Ascending Starseed Souls

Posted July 31st-The Rainbow Scribe – Hilarion July 31st to August 6th

Posted Aug.3rd -Jenny Schiltz – Moving Beyond Limitations

Posted on Aug.4th-Jamye Price –August Ascension Energies 2016

** ❤ Jenny Schiltz – Channeling the Masters – Way Down We Go ❤ **

**And on Aug.16th from Lee Harris’ Facebook page he says:

“Never more than now are many of you looking to draw something good to yourselves. Many of you have bargained with your higher selves or the Universe saying you cannot go on unless you are given something to help keep you afloat.

If this is you, the something you need is you. For some of you, meeting yourself will be the hardest meeting you will ever have because for so long you have been defining yourself by everyone else. But now you have come back to yourself and you are feeling more. Pandora’s Box has been opened.

It is a little like opening the cupboard in the back of your house that you have not looked in for twenty years. You find some wonderful things you had forgotten. You find some unexpected things you are surprised you kept. Many of you have a violent physical reaction to the dust. [Audience laughter]        

~ From Remagnetizing The Heart

Yes Lee, I would definitely be one to have a violent physical reaction to the dust with these allergies of mine…lol   🙂

.

Love ❤