Category Archives: Energy Shifts

The Awakening ~ Part 1

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awakening gif

The Awakening ~

When I first had my Kundalini awakening, I had absolutely NO IDEA what had happened or what I was feeling afterward.  The force of it blew me completely out of my body and I was suddenly in another realm.  I passed through the black void of nothingness  until I saw the essence of the Red Mahakala swirling around in the darkness. It looked like red smoke that formed into the face.

I had to pass through the Mahakala to enter the next realm. In this realm, out of the darkness, a beautiful swirling galaxy appeared before me. The stars seemed to have white and pinkish colors sparkling as the galaxy spiraled in motion (I had never seen the movie “Contact” at this point, but years later when I saw it, it brought tears to my eyes when Jodie Foster saw the Galaxy in the other realm).

I just stared at how profound and beautiful this Galaxy was, until I saw a disembodied face with a tall headpiece (like the Thai Buddha statues) appear before me. It came from the left side of my view.

The face was animated and had a violet/pink color emanating from it and I realized that the face was me!  It stared at me for a while, smiled and winked at me and then I was pulled back into this realm where my physical body was.

Once I came back to my body, all of my chakras were completely blown wide open.  As a result, I was feeling a swaying and tickling sensation on the top of my head (Crown) and in the middle of my chest (Heart Center). I was also seeing symbols floating in the air around me and would begin to see gridlines.  I would spend a lot of time staring at the top of my head, in the mirror, trying to figure out why I could feel it moving, but couldn’t see anything moving lol

Long story short, I eventually got on Google (aka my Guru – lol) and searched “feeling movement on the top of my head” and found information about chakras which led me to the info about Kundalini. Until then, I had no clue what a chakra or Kundalini was and didn’t know (remember) anything about Buddhism.   I did find a lot of stuff that would talk about “Spiritual Emergency” and about some people not being ready for Kundalini and having all sorts of problems.  After extensive research, I decided that the best thing for me to do was to remove as many blocks as I could, and to learn how to work with this force that had completely ripped through my body.

I did a lot of comparison and decided to attend some Reiki Tummo workshops mainly because they worked with the Kundalini energy, removed chakra knots, widened the shushumna and also because they are very focused on strengthening the Heart Center.  I knew I would really need to work on my Heart because I had a lot of childhood trauma and had been in protection-mode for most of my life.

I had been sent to Pennsylvania for a work related 4 month detail when I had my awakening. During this time, I was conducting an investigation on a facility in Reading.  The closest workshop that I found was in Maryland…so within the first month of my awakening, I signed up and took the 3 hour drive to attend the workshop.  I had no idea what I was getting myself into but I felt really good about my decision.

The Attunement (Initiation) ~

The house that the workshop was held at was SO beautiful.  It just felt so mystical with beautiful spiritual artwork, crystals and art pieces from other countries throughout the home.  There was a strong presence of Divine Feminine energy.  When I looked out into the backyard, there was a forest of tall thin aspen trees and everything was white and glistening from the recent snow.  The owner had Husky dogs with white eyes that greeted me at the patio doors as I was staring into the forest in awe.

We all sat in the basement as we listened to Carlos Nakai flute music and were surrounded by the soft scent of sandalwood incense.  They were very respectful and required that everyone be very quiet which made the whole experience feel so sacred. When we had the initial group attunement, I felt a massive amount of Blissful liquid energy forcefully pouring into the top of my head.  It was so strong that it caused my head to move in a circular spiral motion.  When I opened my eyes and looked around the room I could see other people moving in a circular spiral motion too.  There were some advanced practitioners who actually had huge smiles on their faces and had their eyes rolled back into their head as they were spiraling !  I’m not kidding, their eyes were completely white!  They were so overtaken with Bliss from the attunement.

During part of the workshop, in small groups, we would all stand around a person lying on the table, and would all channel energy to the person on the table.  The point and intention of this practice was to open the person’s shushumna and to clear/widen the pathway. As I was channeling the energy through my hands, I felt it start to shoot out of my Heart Center.  It was such a beautiful feeling to have this Divine energy coursing through my Heart.  It felt like a pumping motion as it was pouring out.  I was surprised when one of the instructors came close to my ear and softly whispered “Yes, that’s it…use your Heart”.  It was then that I realized that she could actually see everything that I was feeling.

At times during the workshop, I felt out of place because everyone was so patient and Loving and I wasn’t used to being around people like that.  I was still working in law enforcement and had been pretty hardened by my environment.  I knew that I had a lot of work to do and probably one of the most difficult things that I’ve had to work through was getting over the feeling of not being worthy or not good enough to experience this Divine energy.  I guess growing up around Catholics will do that to you…haha

The Clearing ~

After the class, I took the 3 hour drive back to Pennsylvania.  When I got to my hotel room, I cried the entire night.  The initial cleansing process from such a huge influx of energy was brutal!  Before I ended up falling asleep, I asked ‘God’ why I was chosen to experience this and said that I felt that I wasn’t worthy because I had so much negativity from my life. As I was falling asleep and was in that in-between state, I felt something hug/envelope my body and stroke my face in comfort. It lulled me to sleep.

I remember waking up a few times throughout the night and would see symbols flashing one after another in the air above me.  I was getting some type of download.  Many years later, I saw a video where Lisa Renee called this type of download a “ticker tape” download.  That’s a perfect explanation of what I experienced that night…symbol after symbol flashing one after another for several hours.

Early in the morning when I woke up, I saw a little bright blue orb fluttering around in front of my face.  It had little sparkles coming off of it that looked like pixie dust and it landed on my pillow in front of me as it slowly faded out of sight.

Because of the massive cleansing that I was going through from the attunement, I couldn’t attend the 2nd class that was scheduled the next day.  I ended up staying in bed crying the whole weekend.  I had lots of weird stuff happen during those 2 days in bed going in and out of sleep.  I remember that I had a painting on the wall next to my bed and it was of a lake with a tree next to it, on a sunny day.  One time when I woke from sleep, the painting was of the same lake and tree, only it was winter and snowing!  The symbols continued to download and I continued to feel something stroking my face and arm in comfort.

I rescheduled the 2nd class for a month later, but the only one available was at a totally different location in Pennsylvania.  This class would be with a different group of people.  I’ll write about that experience in another post.

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Love ❤

 

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Scary Monsters

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I’ve noticed a lot of fear popping up in the Spiritual community.  There seems to be a fear of predator energy, a “someone out to get you” theme going around.  What I’m referring to specifically is people rallying against certain teachers saying they’re “not of the true light” “assaulting in the astral realm” etc…  It’s almost like a modern day witch hunt.  It makes me sad to see this in the lightworker community, but at the same time I know that it’s something that these souls have agreed to play out in this lifetime.  It is the dismantling of fear.

I recognize this energy because of a scary experience that I had with a self proclaimed Toltec Sorcerer/Shaman very early-on in my awakening.  It was a scenario that played out in my life with the teacher/student theme.  In the beginning, I only knew that he was a Shaman and wouldn’t find out that he was a sorcerer until after I had agreed to be his apprentice.  I’ll briefly explain a bit of what happened…

Back in 2009, I had taken a trip to the little town of Mesilla, New Mexico, with my (ex) boyfriend.  We were driving through a little street behind the shops and when I looked over to my right, I saw a Native American man with long black hair standing on the sidewalk.  He stood there staring at me…our eyes locked.  He was dressed in all white and had a headband on his head that had rainbow colored beading on it.  As I was staring back at him, he reached his hand up to the side of his face and saluted me as he continued to stare.  I have no idea why I immediately saluted him back…it was just a reflex.

I told my boyfriend that the man had just saluted me and a second later, when I turned my head to point to him, he was gone.  We drove around again looking for him but we didn’t see him anywhere.  It made me wonder if he was really there, or just a spiritual vision/visitation.

I was searching for jobs at the time and was so intrigued by what had happened that day, that I had put in for a government job in a town close to Mesilla.  Very shortly after that, I got the job without even being interviewed!  It just fell into my lap.

To sum it up, there was a man that worked there who had a Native American background. He was an older man with gray hair and a strange white glaze over his eyes.  He told me that he had sent out a request (and did a ritual) for an apprentice to carry on his tradition.  He said he knew I was coming (spiritually) because some employees had killed a snake in the parking lot of the building and chopped its head off.  They had brought the headless snake to him to identify what type of snake it was.  In his belief system, he took that as a sign that someone was coming and because the employees didn’t respect the snake, it would be someone who would not appear to be significant.

As naïve as I was at the time, I thought that he would be my teacher and that it was “meant to be” because of the Native American man saluting me in Mesilla and because I got this job so easily.  I had no idea that this was some crazy Karma stuff that I needed to work through with this man.  Long story short, He did some stuff that led me to believe that he was trying to “steal my soul” and it was the absolute scariest thing I’ve EVER been through.  Toward the end of the whole ordeal, I went through one night of terror where the weather changed very quickly, sounded like someone was walking on my roof and the wind sounded like it was going to blow my house down.  I laid in my bed clenching my Black Tourmaline and invoking the Violet Flame! Lol  I don’t scare easily, so I knew that there were other forces at work here…There’s a very distinct feeling to it, and I will always be able to recognize that signature from now on.

I ended up quitting the job and moving back to Arizona within that week.  I still went through scary feelings for a while after I left.  It was a lot of fear to work through for me and a whole process of coming into my own power.  My closure came when one day my boyfriend had gone fishing and saw a snake in the road that had been partially run over by a car.  The snake was still alive and suffering, so he chopped its head off in an effort to end the suffering.

He brought the headless snake home and it was still moving/wiggling around.  I burnt some sage, did some Reiki and said a prayer over the snake.  When I asked the snake to forgive him and to move on to Source, the snake immediately stopped moving.  My boyfriend said he saw heat waves (life force energy) come out of the snake in that moment.  That was my symbolic closure for what I had gone through with the sorcerer.  The loop had been closed.  I felt completely free of any ties/cords/contracts after that.

But in the end it made me so much stronger and taught me not to depend on anyone to decide what I should do or to protect me.  I had a lot to learn at that point and even though he scared the crap out of me, I now realize that he was helping me to pull the strength from within myself…to stand firm in my own power.  He was a Shaman, although a bit dark (and creepy), I now recognize that he was a master teacher and I am Grateful for his lesson.

snakes

When you work through your shadows, make your dark aspects conscious, have an integration of all parts of self, there is no longer fear of something “outside” of self.

It’s an understanding so deep that there are not even words to describe the unification, the understanding of all that is.  I guess it’s like a Shamanistic view of darkness, for what it is, what it REALLY is.

Fear is a tricky thing.  It is probably the most difficult “program” to work through…so deeply embedded. When something pings that fear in our bodies, our minds can start making up all sorts of stories.  We see connections and “signs” that point toward whatever it is that we are going to create.  We pick them out, select them from many options.  It makes for an exciting story doesn’t it?

Choosing fear is a crossroads moment.  We choose…we ALWAYS have the ability to choose.  There can be signs EVERYWHERE to remind us of this:

F E A R – False Evidence Appearing Real

“Choose Love or Fear – the choice is yours”

“LOVE is all there is”

“Fears are stories we tell ourselves”

“Fear and courage are brothers”

“Fear is the prison – Love is the exit”

But yet, sometimes we still choose fear.  From what I understand, fear was originally a program for survival purposes…but it eventually evolved into something else in a world that is severely out of balance.  Just take a look at the “Horror” industry.  People use fear and being scared as entertainment.  I will admit, I do like a scary psychological thriller as entertainment once in a while.  It can be an adrenaline rush.  Since childhood, I’ve always liked twisted mind benders…it stretches the boundaries of “in the box” thinking.

It’s all a matter of perspective…

Fear can be used as a tool.  If you so choose, it can show you where there are vulnerabilities, where something is still being held that needs Love/transmuting. In this process, sometimes we need fear to kick us in the ass to get us moving again.  On my own journey, sometimes I needed something “bad” or uncomfortable to happen, to kick me out of my comfort zone…or used fear to remind me that I was much stronger than that, that I was running an old program that was still in the last throes of existence.

When you look at it from a detached observer view, without emotion involved, you can see a clearer view, for what it really is.  Fear is a reminder.

The darkness is a teacher, an old friend in agreement to show you your own light.

As the darkness envelopes the night sky, it allows you to see the brilliant flickering emanation of the stars.

A Master Teacher will “show” you and remind you where your light is…where your strength lies within…and will continue to do so, until it is unwavering and impenetrable.

It’s like “tough Love” lessons that your children have to go through.  Sometimes a parent won’t bail them out or “save” them, so that they’ll learn how to save themselves.  That is our responsibility as a parent, to teach our children how to become responsible and independent adults…and so is the role of fear.

We are evolving into Unity Consciousness.  As the old programs of separation flicker in and out of existence, we may have moments of condensed triggers…fluctuating between worlds.  It’s important, if not crucial, to stay in your Heart Center during this time.  If you’re feeling fear, take a moment to step back and detach in observer mode.  Get out of the mind and into the Heart space.

After many experiences and lessons with fear, I’ve come to the realization that nobody is trying to hurt me.  It’s only a game, a learning experience that is actually in my best interest.  Staying in my Heart has always provided me with the answers.  Finding the stillness within has always provided the space for Loving guidance.

When we truly believe and embody that knowing, the last veil of separation will slowly start to unravel…Unity Consciousness will be revealed.  There is no separation.  It is all you and it is all in Love.  Perspective is a master key…the stillness is your sanctuary…the Heart is your guide ❤

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Awareness/Realization/Embodiment/Integration/Be-ing/I AM that

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Bifurcation ~ Choose wisely 😉

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Love ❤

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❤ ❤ ❤

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 ~* ❤ *~

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Ignition

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Godself

Godself ~ Painting by Alex Grey

“Every person is an aspect of one Godself” – Alex Grey

July 29, 2016

I really haven’t felt like posting anything for quite a while.  I’ve been writing in my journal, but just not feeling like sharing, I guess…Something happened yesterday that really affected me and I feel like it was a pretty big shift, so I felt inspired to write about it.

Yesterday something happened that drew so much energy and emotion, that it felt like it combusted.  It started while I was driving home from the store and I got this realization that hit me like a ton of bricks…I realized that I am what we call “God”…I chose my life before I was even born…I am a facet of the Creator, and if I am the Creator, then why in the world am I agreeing to play this stupid game any longer? It actually kind of pissed me off – lol

I’ve always known this to be true, but this realization was different…it’s like something awakened inside of me and I actually felt it in every cell in my body.  I guess I can say that it’s like I embodied/integrated the realization and it started triggering anger…anger because I was blindly participating in something that I didn’t need to be a part of anymore.  Everything started to flash in my mind and I was suddenly seeing my entire life.

It got me to thinking that I have experienced quite a bit of suffering in this lifetime; physical abuse, family issues, homelessness, birth defects, health problems, chronic allergies, EMF hypersensitivity etc…and although I’ve evolved throughout the years, I’m still experiencing difficulty with most of those issues.

So why am I agreeing to this crap?!  Why am I agreeing to participate day-after-day-after-day to allow this illusion to continue to exist?

I started to question everything; what about karma? Isn’t that like a set of rules made up by another person?  Who decided that humans would have to participate in karma?  And what about genetics?  My family has a long list of health issues so I will most likely have them too?  Who decided that? (my doctor told me the other day that I will most likely have osteoporosis because it runs in my family – Huh?! )  What if I don’t agree to that?  What if I know and believe that I can and will change that?  The more questions flooded in, the more agitated I became…but I just allowed myself to delve deep into these feelings and bring them to the surface.

When I got home, I waited until everyone left and I was home alone…then I looked into the mirror, looked directly into my eyes and began to yell.

Reflection

I started with “Hey YOU…I’m talking to YOU, not some outside source or a God sitting on a throne in some distant place, I’m talking to YOU…the one who created this life”.

I yelled to myself that since “I” was responsible for the circumstances in my life, since I chose all of this before I was even born, then “I” was putting my foot down and refusing to participate any longer.

I was angry.  WHO would choose this crap?!  Why would anyone or anything choose suffering or set it up so that a helpless child HAS TO suffer from the very start of their life with circumstances beyond their control?  “I” chose this?

I let it all out and demanded that things change in my life and environment or I will “opt-out’ because I’m SO worn out…I said I was tired and beat-up and physically/emotionally exhausted…and I refused to participate in this stupid game any longer.

I had done the work, handed over full trust to this process, activated dormant chakras, forgiven, cleared, released, cleared again and again, embodied, integrated, anchored, transformed, transmuted, transfigured, transcended…ALL of the T’s….but after all of that, I still had pain and suffering, and now I’d hit rock bottom.  I was consciously putting my foot down.  NO MORE PAIN AND SUFFERING.

After screaming at my reflection and letting it all out, I felt so much better.  The rush of emotion seemed to clear and I was able to calm down.  It felt like a huge release of pressure from my core…like a volcano erupting.  A while later, once I became calm again and was able to get centered, I tuned in to what I had just experienced.  I was able to understand what had happened.

I realized that my emotional outburst was a huge shift in my energetic field and a substantial release…another tier in the awakening stratum (I didn’t even know what the word stratum meant, but it popped into my mind) .  Revolutionary anger is always a sign of change in the making….lol   And that is a reflection in the outer world today…and now, a revolution within my own body as well…Ahhh…

This was a huge catalyst that was igniting a transformation from within.  The images that I received were of flames combusting and igniting other flames.

flame

This is the beginning of many coming into their own true power (consciously).  Not the kind of power as in wars and control, but the exact opposite of that.  This is the uprising of Unconditional Love, protection and security…the security to fully awaken with full support and understanding.  The security to release all of the programming.

Sometimes it’s not that we need protection from the “bad guys”(illusions)….sometimes we need protection from ourselves(creators)…from our programming of self sabotage and actions due to habit…from our belief systems, from societal conditioning.  It just takes one person to guide another through that and to bring it to awareness…to ignite the flame.

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Today there is a new sense of confidence, of being stronger and a “knowing” that all is in the process of transformation.  Change is inevitable…I choose to believe that things will change, that in that moment of looking in the mirror, they have already been changed.

So…”Hey YOU, the one that created this life…I choose CHANGE.”

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And so it is 🙂

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                Macy Kate Band -“Imagine Dragons – Radioactive” cover (Click HERE for lyrics)

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**After writing this, I found some posts that were a confirmation to this recent experience…awesome sync! :

Posted July 30th-Ronna Herman – Open Letter to Ascending Starseed Souls

Posted July 31st-The Rainbow Scribe – Hilarion July 31st to August 6th

Posted Aug.3rd -Jenny Schiltz – Moving Beyond Limitations

Posted on Aug.4th-Jamye Price –August Ascension Energies 2016

** ❤ Jenny Schiltz – Channeling the Masters – Way Down We Go ❤ **

**And on Aug.16th from Lee Harris’ Facebook page he says:

“Never more than now are many of you looking to draw something good to yourselves. Many of you have bargained with your higher selves or the Universe saying you cannot go on unless you are given something to help keep you afloat.

If this is you, the something you need is you. For some of you, meeting yourself will be the hardest meeting you will ever have because for so long you have been defining yourself by everyone else. But now you have come back to yourself and you are feeling more. Pandora’s Box has been opened.

It is a little like opening the cupboard in the back of your house that you have not looked in for twenty years. You find some wonderful things you had forgotten. You find some unexpected things you are surprised you kept. Many of you have a violent physical reaction to the dust. [Audience laughter]        

~ From Remagnetizing The Heart

Yes Lee, I would definitely be one to have a violent physical reaction to the dust with these allergies of mine…lol   🙂

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Love ❤

Infinite Love

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Universe

Deep at the center of my being, there is an infinite well of Love  ~ Louise Hay

 

One day while working at the spa in Sedona, I just didn’t feel like staying for my entire shift. I had a very strong urge to leave early, but I didn’t really know why. The director of the spa was the only management there that day, and he was going to leave early. I had to rush to his office to catch him before he left.   I asked to leave early, told him I had something to do, but really, I didn’t have any reason other than my urge to leave. He approved it and I went back to work for another couple of hours.

One of the massage therapists came in to talk to me for a while. This particular therapist hadn’t spoken to me much, so it was nice to get to know her a bit. I was surprised to find out that she is a fellow Kundalite, which is always refreshing to hear! We spoke of our Kundalini awakenings, other dimensions and other random spiritual experiences.

While we were talking, she mentioned that it was the last day of the Buddha Relic show in Sedona and that her and her mother had gone earlier in the day, before she came into work. This was the last show in the U.S., and it had been said that the relics would never be shown in the United States again…EVER. When she mentioned it, I realized that I had already asked to leave work early and that I would be able to see the relics in the very last hour of the show before they closed. I was leaving work at 4pm and they were closing the show at 5pm.

I told her that I had heard about it a couple of weeks before, but had completely forgotten about it and was SO thankful for her reminding me. She said that she kept hearing my name in her mind throughout the day, so she decided to come and talk to me as she was being guided to do so. We both agreed that it was meant to be smile1

So I left work early and went straight to the show. As I was walking up to the building, there was a very friendly young man standing outside who was guiding people to the building and answering questions. He had a very sweet and happy energy. We had a little chat and I told him about my coincidence of taking off early from work. He was amused by the story and assured me that it was meant to be. I proceeded to enter the building and walked into a room filled with people praying, meditating and staring into nothingness.  As soon as I walked toward the relics, a wall of energy hit me. I started to buzz and vibrate, my field was saturated with warmth and I very quickly began to feel like I was hyperventilating.

The wait was a little long, because you had to stand in line to get your turn to walk around the relics. I was trying my best not to go into full panic attack mode before I had my turn. I could feel energy forcefully pouring out of both of my hands like I was giving a Reiki treatment to someone. My energy field felt huge and expanded. It was really bizarre. I almost left, because the energy was making me dizzy and I was having trouble standing in line for so long. I suddenly didn’t feel comfortable being too close to anyone around me…it became extremely overwhelming…sensory overload…

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Buddha

 

When it was finally my turn, I was nervous because I had no idea how I would react when I got closer.  I proceeded with caution  scared.  Once I got up to the Buddha relics, I took a picture, stared for a while, kneeled & bowed my head and connected with the relics.   I immediately burst into tears.  I was over taken by complete surrender, Love and Compassion.  It was a deep cry that came from my core, not just tears.  I tried to hold it in, because there were so many people around me and I was embarrassed to be the only one crying.

I couldn’t stop crying, so when I got up from kneeling, I took a very quick walk around to see the other relics and quickly left the building.  Somehow I felt satisfied that whatever needed to be done, had already been done, so seeing the rest of the relics was not important.

On my way back to my car, I walked by the nice man outside while wiping away my tears and told him what had happened.  His face lit up and he was smiling from ear to ear.  He seemed to be very happy and told me that he asks everyone who walks out afterward, if they had felt anything while in the presence of the relics.  He said majority of the people say no, that they didn’t feel anything at all.  He assured me that the strong connection that I experienced was because my Heart was fully open…and he congratulated me !  lol  He said that the amount of Love that I felt in that moment was something that my soul will never forget and will carry infinitely…and of course, he made me cry even more when he said that, so it was time for me to leave sad

I didn’t expect to have such a profound experience while in the presence of the relics.  It was something that I will never forget.  When I look back on this experience, I always think of the nice man’s words when he said that my soul will always carry the Love that I felt from the Buddha relics…and I realize that in that moment, I have been forever changed.  I will never be the same…I have reunited with a part of myself that had been long forgotten.

 

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Infinite Love ❤

 

 

❤ Prajna Paramita Heart Sutra Mantra ❤

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Diamond Solar Heart ~

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On March 12th, something shifted when I woke up in the morning… I heard 3 loud chimes (kindof like bell ringing tones, but more like someone swept across 3 keys on a xylophone very quickly) and when I heard the sounds; I saw an image in my mind that looked like white sun rays with a light gray background. It kinda looked like this but with light gray instead of the black:

                                                   rays

I wasn’t sure what to make of it, so later I meditated on it and got the message that it was a marker for a new level/phase/initiation. I was a little confused at first, so I asked for a better explanation. I was shown that when I hear the chimes and shown the pictures in my mind, it’s because a new (group) level has been reached. The tones represent an addition to the harmonization of signature tone. The picture is a representation of a new level. This particular picture shown to me is of Diamond Rays? At first I wasn’t sure if I was interpreting that correctly, but that’s what I got. So I did a little research on the internet and it occurred to me that the rays looked similar to other pictures that I found:

Milarepa´s heart of light rainbowbody

And then I found this picture which made more sense:

Precious Diamond With Rainbow

Ahhh…. So that’s what it means. There’s a large group who has reached the level of Diamond Light Body/Rainbow Body. I was given the message that this will be triggered or beginning phases for this group on or around Spring Equinox/Solar Eclipse. So on March 19th, I woke up in the morning and felt a sensation of warmth coming from my core. It spread outward and felt like it was filling up my body. It would last for a while until I was distracted by outside noise and then the sensation would stop. I’ve felt it before, but never really paid attention to it enough to figure out what it was.

SolarHeart

I decided to focus on it to see if I could make it happen at will, and found that I actually could…When I focused on it, I was shown (and also physically felt) that it was my Solar Plexus and Heart chakras blending or combining together and this was creating an energy that was emanating outward. It has something to do with merging timelines or realities? I’m not sure if I interpreted that correctly? Something more along the lines of zero point, meaning that it’s a merging of HU-man authentic power energy (Solar Plexus) with Divine Love (Heart)…creating some sort of bridge/portal to anchor. The message I got was that the merging of the two created a portal that will anchor the Higher energies… I’m not even going to pretend that I understand any of that stuff -lol   …I’m sure there’s much more to it than my limited interpretation.

It was clearly a very warm energy and I could feel such a blissful comfort from it. When the warmth would emanate outward, I felt like I was expanding and leaving my body…kind of like I was expanding to a different realm. It was an awesome feeling to be able to control it for the first time, since this type of stuff has only happened randomly without my knowing or conscious direction. I was shown that now that I was aware of it, I could create it anytime I wanted. I went online and searched “Solar Heart chakra” to see if I could find anything, but there really wasn’t anything except one post about the merging of the Heart and Solar Plexus.   The author had also experienced the same sensation and called it the “Solar Heart chakra”. The article can be found HERE

**Later after writing about this, I stumbled upon a post from Sandra Walter that she wrote in May 2013 while searching for something else. I was surprised that she had already written about it and she had even posted a video about it. She called it the “Solar Heart center”.  I guess I wasn’t ready for it until now…Her post can be found HERE

Picture from Sandra’s article :

Diamond

In her explanation, she describes it as a diamond and this center being between the Heart and High Heart center. She doesn’t mention anything about the Solar Plexus though…. So now this is all coming together…it totally makes sense. I never really understood how I was supposed to create or manifest, and had tried several different techniques. Sometimes things would manifest, and sometimes they wouldn’t. What I did realize is that sometimes I unintentionally manifested stuff when I was in a state of high emotion. But the message that I’m getting from this Solar Heart experience is that this is the tool to consciously manifest and create without having to worry about the high emotion influencing the creation. It is of Christed Light, so lower energies are not even an option in this form of manifestation.

At the moment, the strongest way for me to connect to this merge, is in the half awake/half asleep state. When I wake up in the morning, if I don’t fully let myself wake up, seems to be the best time to play with this. I’ve been doing this for a few days now. I’ll keep playing with it and see if I can bring myself into this state while fully awake.

Love ❤

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Walking in Harmony

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It’s been quite a while since I’ve been able to write anything.  I can’t really explain it, but it’s almost like I wasn’t “allowed” to write anything.  When I’d make an attempt to post an update, I’d get a big “NOT NOW” that would shut me down.  This has been such a deep integration for the last three months that I totally got lost in it…I saw a post from Sandra Walter recently and it was a huge confirmation to what I’ve been going through in these last few months.  The post can be found HERE.

So I finally moved out of my (ex)boyfriend’s house in Phoenix, Arizona. On March 1st,  I made a trip to California with most of the big stuff and then officially left Arizona for good on April 19th (the day before Easter).  I did realize that I left a few odds and ends after I moved out, so I recently took a brief trip back to Arizona to pick it up.  While I was in Arizona, we took a trip to Sedona (which I have written about below).

So now I’m living in Coto de Caza, California which is also known as “Orange County”.  It’s very close to Laguna Beach.  It’s SO beautiful here and the weather is perfect.  I have this serene feeling of freedom living here with my cousin.

But enough about that, I’ll get into the energetic transformation that is currently taking place…

~***~

Energy Sensations

So the last three months have been INTENSE to say the least.  Kundalini is kicking my ass – LOL   I’m definitely not the same as I was three months ago…my body has dramatically changed and I can feel the different rewiring that has taken effect.  There’s been a stream of energy pouring in only on the right side of my Crown chakra every day for the past couple of months.  I wonder why it’s just in that same spot?  My energy is alive and constantly moving around adjusting throughout the day.  There seem to be many embodiments residing within me.

The next thing that I’ve realized is that energy on my lower legs (calves) has dramatically changed.  I’m not sure if an experience that I had in Sedona had anything to do with it, but on my recent last trip back to Arizona to pick up the rest of my stuff, we decided to visit Sedona.  It was on May 24th around the time that there were forest fires close to the area.  I wanted to go so that I could say some prayers for rain and protection for Sedona.

While we were there, we stopped at a little outdoor vendor sale with tents.  When I passed by one of the vendors, a wall of energy forcefully pulled my energy downward.  I’ve never felt anything like it, it was the most powerful energetic grounding sensation that I’ve ever felt so far.  I was totally shocked by this and walked back to the vendor to see what they were selling.  It was a booth for jewelry that claims to help ground your energy!  Well, I can definitely say that it REALLY works since I felt it even before I knew what the product was! I didn’t physically touch any of the jewelry, so the profound effect it had on my energy was probably from all of the jewelry combined in a small space…combined with the energies in Sedona, it created some sort of vortex.

My (ex)boyfriend wanted to buy some of the jewelry for himself since I had felt such a strong energy coming from it.  As I was standing there waiting for him to browse, my energy continued to forcefully pull downward…after a while, I felt something reaching into my root/sacral chakra areas and it started “working” on me.  I had to spread my feet apart and stand in a more stable position as this forceful pulling and “work” was being done on me in front of everyone.  It was so funny to have this all going on while everyone around me was totally clueless as to what was happening.   I just stood there quietly laughing while nobody noticed.  After we left, my lower back slightly ached on the right side…the only other time my back ached like that, in the same exact spot, was when I got my Reiki Tummo attunements.  I must have had a huge flush of energy flowing through me to trigger that same effect.

So since that experience in Sedona, I am now frequently feeling this strange buzzy energy whipping around my lower legs.  It’s almost as if some additional anchoring channels were opened or widened in that area.  The next night energy was strongly pouring into my feet (stronger than ever before) accompanied by the sensation of an energy enveloping the outside of my calves (emanating into my legs from the outside).  The outer sensation felt very electromagnetic.  A few days later, I realized that each time my foot hit the ground while walking, my leg would vibrate, but only when the foot hits the ground.  It’s so bizarre…it happens every single time I walk now, so I decided to meditate on it to see if I got any information…

tuning_fork

While in meditation, I got a vision of a tuning fork.  The message I received was that my lower leg bones were acting as a tuning fork?  Huh?  That sounds so silly, but that’s what I got…When my feet hit the ground while walking, it strikes my bones and they vibrate like a tuning fork causing some type of energy balancing effect.  I had to laugh when I initially got the message, because it just really sounds “out there” – LOL  But then I realized that we are here to bring in new codes, anchoring in new vibrations and tones…so why couldn’t it be true?  If I believe it’s true, then I agree to create it, and then it will become my reality.

**On September 21, 2014, I stumbled upon a page in Lisa Renee’s Ascension Glossary  (while researching “bone marrow” on the internet) and it was a total confirmation to the information that I was receiving…WOW…The page can be found here:

http://ascensionglossary.com/index.php/Law_of_Resonance 

 

Later in the evening, after receiving this vision, I saw a picture of Egyptian hieroglyphs on television, and it showed the Egyptian god who has some type of tuning fork looking thing on his head…I’m not sure if it is an actual tuning fork on his head, but it prompted me to start searching for stuff on the internet.

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Then I searched “Egyptian tuning fork” and saw pictures of hieroglyphs with two tuning forks passing energy to each other :

egyptian tuning forks

 

I also found this on the crystalinks site:

“Discoveries emerging from Egypt, describe the existence of a world wide pyramid temple system in prehistory, mounted like antennae on key energy meridians, which were employed by ancient priest-scientists as harmonic tuning forks to stabilize the tectonic plates of the planet’s cataclysmic geology. From the mother tongue word Jedaiah, meaning ‘The Way of the Word’ or ‘The Power of the Word’, the ancient Jedai priests used the Language of Light to tune the planet like a giant harmonic bell. Much is being rediscovered in the last days of this time cycle.”  The whole article can be found HERE.

After finding many connections, it reminded me that I had awakened in the morning on March 10th and saw an illuminated pattern surrounding me.  It was difficult to see with my eyes open, but was very clear when I closed my eyes.  It looked like many strands of DNA that were all activated and moving at the same time.  The only picture that I could find that kinda looked like it was this one:

dna

The strands didn’t have the lines in between them though, and the strands were all much closer together. Their movement seemed to generate a tone.  I got the idea that they were all dancing or in sync with each other.  The words that came to mind while witnessing this were “harmony” and “harmonics”…and when I looked up the word “harmonic” on the internet, I found this photo :

harmonic

So I’m thinking maybe I wasn’t seeing DNA, but was actually seeing harmonics in action.  Then to further add to the syncs, I began reading lots of posts from various sources that are speaking about harmonics.  One of the posts was by Earthkeeper Tyberonn who posted information about a “Portal of Harmony” on February 2nd which can be found HERE.  and on April 11th about the “Harmonic Trigger” which he states, began on the Spring Equinox March 20th and would continue until Summer Solstice June 21st which can be found HERE.  I’m now seeing the word “harmony” everywhere…

Maybe actual people are being “harmonically triggered” during this time and their bodies are walking tuning forks?  Hmmm…that gives me something to think about…

 

“The search for meaning is really the search for the lost chord. When the lost chord is discovered by humankind, the discord in the world will be healed and the symphony of the universe will come into complete harmony with itself.” ~John O’Donohue

 

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Love ❤

 

 

**After writing this post, I found a post on July 8th that speaks of harmonics and our spine being a tuning fork…Wow! Such an awesome sync to find that!  I very strongly resonated with what she wrote and got very emotional while reading it for some reason…  The post can be found here: http://judithkusel.wordpress.com/2014/07/07/the-awakening-deep-within/

 

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Infinity ~Twin Flame Awareness

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In the beginning of November, I had a vision of a key being handed to me with an infinity symbol on it…I also saw an Ankh with an infinity symbol on the top (instead of a circle) but I wasn’t too sure what this meant.  I wrote about the vision in a blog HERE.

After meditating on it for a while, I got the message that the infinity symbol was given to me specifically for the purpose of assisting with the ancestral karmic energies I was currently working through.  I was shown that the sideways infinity symbol (or LEMNISCATE ) was to be focused on or visualized actively moving in my mind while having the intention of clearing the ancestral energies.

zeropoint

I followed my guidance and used the symbol many times for clearing…I also used it on my boyfriend while doing healing on his sciatic nerve pain that he’s been suffering from lately.  I believe sciatic pain is associated with blocked meridians and nadis due to ancestral junk that we’ve accumulated over many lifetimes.  I also believe that fibromyalgia is linked to this as well.  It really seemed to work on his pain and he said he noticed a big difference after the energy healing was done.

I just recently became aware that the infinity symbol is linked to twin flame/twin soul reunion (awareness).  It all started with a beautiful dream that I had on the night of December 17th (night of the full moon).

This dream was unlike any other I’ve ever had…in the dream, I was visited by a Buddhist monk and we were totally and completely in Love with each other…I could feel this strong feeling of Love just by him being in my presence, it was emanating out of him. In the dream, we were going to get married and I understood that he was going to be my teacher for the rest of my life.

It was a HUGE relief to me, like if everything from that point on, was going to be ok… I was SO in Love with him, it was beyond anything I have ever felt in my entire life…I felt my whole being totally surrender to him and knew without a doubt that he was going to complete me in such a way, that I would never have to search for answers to anything ever again. The feeling was so strong, that I cannot even express into words how it felt.

I know that Buddhist monks take a vow of celibacy and have only read of special and rare circumstances that they may marry someone, so it’s extremely rare. I guess the message that I initially took from the dream was that it was more of an internal union than a literal marriage in 3D. I was thinking maybe it represented the union of masculine and feminine aspects of self?

Video from Meline Lafont:

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I saw a video on December 19th by Meline Lafont that speaks of this phase of currently embodying the I AM presence (she also mentions heart palpitations which I’ve been having a lot of lately).  Her video triggered some questions and I searched “I AM presence masculine and feminine” on the internet out of curiosity. I realized that the I AM presence is actually the masculine and feminine aspects merged which I hadn’t really thought about before. Now that makes sense to me regarding my dream. I later realized that on December 17th the full moon was in Gemini which represents “twin” energy…maybe twin flame/twin soul energy?

Throughout this process, I’ve never really paid much attention to the twin flame stuff…I just never really believed that my twin flame was incarnated here on Earth and the thought of reuniting physically with him didn’t resonate with me. After this dream, I now fully believe that my twin flame is not incarnated on Earth and that my “reuniting” is not an actual reuniting, but more of a remembering, or conscious awareness.

The message that I’m getting from this dream is that I’ve always been merged with my twin flame, it’s just that it was not in my conscious awareness. Now that I’ve become consciously aware and have integrated the awareness of his presence, I feel his presence within me…it’s as if I can pull that feeling of complete unconditional Love from within me anytime I want, now that I’m aware of it. He is always with me. I’m even getting teary eyed right now just writing about it…I’ve never felt this type of feeling before…it’s unlike anything I’ve ever experienced.

Why would I need to manifest this union physically when I can feel his Love always (in all ways) within? I would not want to change this perfection by incarnating it in this imperfect realm…there is no need or desire for anything other than what it is.

~***~

After doing a little more research, I found lots of stuff regarding twin flames associated with the infinity symbol and realized that the awareness of the infinity symbol is the beginning of the twin flame awareness. One of the articles I found showed this symbol:

Infinity Master Symbol

The article says: “By activating the Infinity Master Creative Symbol (all of it) you bring the 5 Elements (Earth, Fire, Air, Water and Ether) into balance. You activate the Alpha – Omega – One-Heart Chakra System once again. You receive and activate the Grail Codes and you activate and bring the Feminine/Masculine and Twin Flame Love into balance. Furthermore you activate the Holomatrix of Love in Pure White Light to begin automatically releasing and healing everything which do not serve your highest good any longer and add all that you need to reach the enlightenment at high speed and with ease and grace.”

The rest of the article can be found HERE

I also found a site that had this symbol:

twinflame-symbol

The article says:

“Germain began with an image of two circles that symbolized the separate entities before remembering the Twin Flame journey.”

“He continued by showing the infinity symbol and described how this was the beginning of the Twin Flames journey. As the two circles come closer together and begin to form the two halves of the eight, (infinity symbol) this symbolized the beginning of the coming together of the divine masculine and the divine feminine. Through working together whether in the physical or the etheric realms they would experience within the inner eye of the heart the moving energies as it traveled around the infinity symbol. As the two energies meet in the middle it can be clearly seen as the magnetic energies of the divine feminine and the electric energies of the divine masculine.  (The link to the article that this came from, is no longer working).

~***~

I’m having a difficult time explaining what’s been shown to me (by my inner guidance) about the infinity symbol, but here are some pictures that might help to explain it better:

From The Emerald Tablet:

“When thou hast entered the form thou hast dwelt in, use thou the cross and the circle combined. Open thy mouth and use thou thy Voice. Utter the Word and thou shalt be free. Only the one who of Light has the fullest can hope to pass by the guards of the way. And then must he move through strange curves and angles that are formed in direction not known to man.”

**Click on Ankh pictures for updated findings (July 24, 2015):

ankh1      ankh2

~***~

From the Emerald Tablet:

“Only they could guard God’s creation. Then did I pass ëround the circle of eight. Saw all the souls who had conquered the darkness. Saw the splendor of Light where they dwelled. Longed I to take my place in their circle, but longed I also for the way I had chosen, when I stood in the Halls of Amenti and made my choice to the work I would do.”

Circle of Eight:

infinity1  zeropoint

~***~

Old Way ~ Wheel of Karma

ouroboros Wheelofkarma

~***~

New Way ~ In This NOW

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~***~

Infinity Spirit/Sol and Soul/Luna, Male and Female

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There are four elements in this image that are connected by an ouroborus symbol. The lion represents the essence of spirit and the swan symbolizes the feminine soul. Here the lion consumes the female swan within the stage of the work that she represents, namely, the albedo. Thus the silver, or white stone, is in the process of being transmuted into gold. The lion and the swan, spirit and soul, are captured in their cosmic counterparts, sun (Sol) and moon (Luna), within the ouroborus. Typically the snake devouring its own tail is presented as a circle representing a state of primal unconsciousness; activated but not going anywhere. But, here we see this symbol in the form of the infinity sign, thus indicating a shift toward conscious integration of the energies of spirit/Sol and soul/Luna [male and female].  (Link for the article that this picture came from, is no longer working)

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I apologize for not being able to explain the information that I’ve received and just using pictures, but it’s such a deep “knowing” that my limited interpretation cannot fully explain.  I hope it makes sense and is my wish that it will help in some way on one’s journey.  The gold/silver, male/female, mirror image, serpent/snakes, I AM presence, infinity symbol are all coming together and the pieces of the puzzle are quickly filling in.  It’s not what I would have expected it to be, but it’s a reminder that following your Heart is so important in this process.  There is no right or wrong, but if you follow what truly resonates with your Heart, you will always find your way home GoldenHeart

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Twin Flames captured above my head in a photo after this experience

 

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Clearing The Shadows

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I’ve been immersed in a deep stillness for the past few weeks.  It was difficult to put anything into words so I wasn’t able to write anything for quite a while.  This seems to be a new level of peaceful calm that I’ve never experienced before…it’s even difficult to put into words what it feels like.

~***~

October 8, 2013

Last night something strange happened…when I was trying to go to sleep, I found that I couldn’t actually fall asleep.  I was in some type of “in between” state of consciousness where I was still aware that I was in my bedroom, but I was also somewhere else…almost like I was expanded everywhere.  I kept slipping out of this consciousness because I was feeling a strong pulling sensation on my solar plexus, but I’d immediately fall back into this in between state.  I kept hearing something moving around in the room with me.  I felt like I was in an extreme state of heightened awareness…almost like I could hear things for miles.

This has happened a few times before, but it usually lasts for many hours, sometimes an entire 8 hours worth of sleep time.  When it’s happened in the past, I felt like I didn’t get any sleep at all.  This time I was able to finally fall asleep and have a dream.  This dream was of me clearing shadows.  It was like there were many shadows that were crossing over and I was supervising them.

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I get the feeling that they were agreeing to be transmuted/transcended.  It wasn’t a fight or a struggle, they were actually surrendering because their work was done and their purpose had been served.  It was not about being defeated, it was about being finished with their purpose.

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At the end of the dream, I was in the middle of nowhere in a huge desert.  It looked like New Mexico or Arizona.  It was overcast and dark, kind of gloomy like the lower astral realm.

I was witnessing tall black shadow figures walking off of the land of this huge desert.  They were voluntarily leaving so that they could be transmuted.  There were so many of them coming out of the ground and I got the feeling that they had occupied the land for many generations.  They were the creations of some very dark work…but were now free to leave from the cycle they had been stuck in.  They were not fleeing; they were just walking calmly in slow motion, all of them walking toward the same direction.

The word that I got from witnessing these shadows was “Transcendence”.   The cycle they had served for so long had now come to an end.   It was a mutual agreement and the purpose that they had served for so long had now come to an end…It was done very peacefully…no judgment…I just understood that they were playing a role.

I’m not sure what this all means…Was I witnessing my own clearing or was it something on a much larger scale? If it is larger, maybe I’ll read something about it soon (**see links below)…but I do feel like it’s been done on a very large scale and some very deeply rooted darkness has now been liberated…It’s so strange because I also felt (and still feel) such a peaceful calm around me.  I would think that dealing with such darkness would cause maybe some agitation or nervousness (as it has in the past for me), but I didn’t experience anything other than Peace and balance throughout the whole process.  It was actually very beautiful with a touch of sadness…It’s almost like I felt sorry for them…or maybe I was just picking up on the melancholy vibe?

It might sound corny, but I kept hearing the song “The Air That I Breathe” by the Hollies when I woke from the dream…it keeps playing in my head when I think of the dream now.  I can’t help but laugh…it seems silly to me…

The song is here:

I wrote this blog on October 8th, but felt that I shouldn’t post it right away…I needed some time to settle and see how I felt about it over a period of time…What has happened over the last week is that I came to a better understanding of what “roles” are played in this game of illusion.  I’ve come to a deeper understanding of light and dark.  For the first time, I truly understand (feel) that there is no separation.  It’s very difficult to put into words.

I can’t seem to get that feeling of “sadness” or “melancholy” from the shadow figures out of my mind (Heart)…it’s been continuously playing over and over again and the feeling has stayed with me.  The feeling is settling with me, but it’s changing and getting lighter as each day passes. Maybe it’s integrating?  I don’t know… I apologize for not being able to explain it better since it’s a new feeling and experience for me.  The only thing I can say for certain is that I have a whole new respect for the roles that the shadows have played in the illusion.  The masks have been removed and what I see is a familiar face.

It reminds me of the end of the movie “The Game” when Michael Douglas finds out that everything he had been through was just a game…everyone was just playing a role and he was so relieved that everyone was really his friend not his enemy.

Movie scene can be found here:

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I’ve reached a whole new level of understanding and it feels very good.  The more layers I work through on the inside, the more veils are lifted on the outside. Awareness and realization on a whole new level… My views of this world and everything in it are rapidly changing at an accelerated pace…a little more every day…I’m starting to remember 😉

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Shine

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**After posting this blog, I found an article from Lisa Renee that she posted on October 28, 2013…all I can say is WOW…she explains everything that I witnessed in my lucid dream…WOW – what a sync !… The article can be found here: http://www.energeticsynthesis.com/index.php/resource-tools/blog-timeline-shift/2308-new-physicalization-begins

**I also found an article from Sandra Walter posted on October 25th, 2013.  I really resonated with what she wrote and it seems to tie in with what I’ve written.  The article can be found here: http://www.sandrawalter.com/the-silence-the-stream-the-fractal/#comments

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Love ❤

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The Blue Rose

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I didn’t want to write about this yet because I don’t fully understand it, but I’m getting such a strong feeling about it that I wanted to document it anyway…I just got back from driving from the store and noticed that the car in front of me had a license plate that said “BLUROSE”, so I’ll take that as a confirmation!  So funny when that happens 🙂

~***~

In astrology, there is a Grand Sextile alignment that is to take place on July 29, 2013.  I found an article that breaks down the time frame for this alignment here:

http://archive.constantcontact.com/fs166/1101472333529/archive/1114157915218.html

I read that this alignment is pretty rare and also read somewhere that the last time it happened like this, was in 1945 around the time WWII ended.  In this alignment, the planets form into the shape of the Star of David, or as other people may identify with, a “Merkaba”.  There are a lot of skeptics out there regarding this alignment, so as with all info on the internet, please use discretion…You may or may not resonate with it, and either way is fine…it is to my understanding that the same events can be experienced differently in different vibrations/timelines and resonance will vary from person to person.  What do you believe in?  What are you creating?

GrandSextile

I want to try to explain something that came into my awareness recently, having to do with this alignment, but I’m having a hard time trying to find the words.  That’s been happening to me a lot lately, because I tend to think in pictures or feelings instead of words…but I’ll give it a try…

So…..I was recently reminded of “The Blue Rose” which I first saw years ago in a movie when I was a kid (while visiting my Grandmother’s house for the summer).  The name of the movie is “The Thief of Bagdad”.  There are several versions of the movie out there, but the one I saw was released in 1961 and the star of the movie was Steve Reeves.

The Blue Rose scene from this movie can be found here:

To briefly sum it up, in this movie, a man is on a quest to find a Blue Rose to try to save a Princess.  This Blue Rose is said to be found “beyond the mystical 7 gates”.

I’ve been drawn to blue roses since my childhood and have collected things with blue roses ever since.  The energy of the Blue Rose came into my awareness recently by a feeling that I had.  I associate the Blue Rose with memories of my Grandmother. To me, memories of my Grandmother represent unconditional motherly Love and security which I’ve been feeling a very strong presence of lately.  There’s been a strong feeling of feminine energy, Love and comfort around me for a while now…and it’s weird because in the last week, I’ve had men in public, who are complete strangers, become very protective of me and want to shield me from harm…it’s really bizarre…

 I did some research on the internet as to the meaning of the Blue Rose…this is what I found:

The Blue Rose & the Shoshanayin

“Flowers have long been associated with enlightenment, and as the ancient Egyptians taught about the “Blue Lotus Retreat” – the Esssene tribe taught about “Blue Rose” healing. It is believed that both Mother Mary and Mari Magdalene were members of the Essenes, and that Mari Magdalene called her teachings “The Blue Rose”.  The teaching is to have originated from Venus, and was brought to the earth by Mother Mary. Wherever the Essenes lived,  people referred to them as “Healers”.  The word ‘Essene’ stems from the Aramaic word ‘Assaya’, which means ‘Healer’.  The Essenes were called ‘Therapeutae’, when they were in Egypt, and that is where the word ‘Therapist’ originates from.” 

 

“This form of healing is associated with Love and Compassion. You may have a dream or a vision of a rose, and the color may tell you which order you belong to, or which Rose you need to learn more about! The Order of the Blue Rose was considered to be a special order for only the most faithful followers of those that followed the path known as The Essene Way.  The Essenes believed that the Christ Ray is carried in both the feminine and masculine, therefore Mari Magdalene was considered to be the feminine Christ.  The Essenes also believed in receiving direct knowledge from God.  They achieved this through what is known as “The Sacred Marriage”.  It is the marriage of the male and female within.” 

The rest of the article can be found here: http://sisterhoodoftherose.homestead.com/testimonials.html

Now, when I was reading an article about the Grand Sextile written by Randy Bruner aka “Blue Cosmic Hand” (the article can be found here:

http://galacticspacebook.com/profiles/blogs/this-is-the-big-one-we-ve-all-been-waiting-for-the-grand-sextile?xg_source=facebook )

there was a part of the article that said “On the last day of the 13 moon calendar Cosmic Moon 28, July 24, 2013, the Moon moves into conjunction with Neptune. This adds the power of love from the Super Moon to the power of our highest hopes and dreams from the planet Neptune. This ends out the cycle of the 7 Mystic Moons.”  That immediately made me think of the Blue Rose “7 mystical gates”.  The 7 Mystic Moons are leading up to the Grand Sextile which some are associating with Ascension of the Earth or birth of the new Earth because of the Merkaba formation (As above, So below)…Gaiaportal also had a message about the 777 portal which can be found here:

http://gaiaportal.wordpress.com/2013/07/07/entrance-of-777-portals-continues-up-step-processing/

I’ve been seeing “777” or “77” everywhere (license plates, buildings, etc…) for a few months now and even had $7.77 on my receipt the other day.  I’ve also been sensing and seeing a lot of blue energy around me lately, especially in the last few days and I’m feeling that it may have to do with the Blue Rose.  I see blue orbs and blue flashes around me all day… I do feel like I’m currently anchoring in some of this blue energy and I know I have in the past. I don’t really understand it enough to explain it properly – I apologize….

The Blue Rose, the Essenes, Mother Mary, feminine energy, Mother Earth, Merkaba, birth of the new world, 7 gates/portals…they all tie in together but I just haven’t quite found what I’m looking for to bring them all together.  I’ll write more about it if I can find the words or any new connections…

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Picture of blue light captured in Sedona on 12-12-09

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Love ❤

The Void Space

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I meant to post this yesterday, but didn’t get around to it…

Haven’t written in a while because I’ve been at a complete stand still…definitely in a void right now.  I realized that nothing about me is familiar anymore.  I have no identity…I’ve been cleared like a clean slate.  Not sure if it’s uncomfortable because I don’t have anything to compare it to!  Everything is gone from my energy field…all preferences are gone, don’t even know what I like or don’t like anymore.  Nothing appeals to me like in a “desire” kind of way, like indulging in a favorite food or smelling a favorite scent.  I have no addictions anymore or cravings.  But it does seem kinda “Blah” and I’m not sure what to do with this yet.  I’m sure it’ll get better once I learn how to navigate.  I do feel very dizzy still, and fuzzy throughout the day…like I’m not really here.

This seems to feel like I’m being rebuilt…lots of restructuring going on…not physical like feeling the work being done, but on a consciousness level, and so many possibilities are available, I’m just taking my time to choose (I guess?). ..or maybe I won’t even choose, and it’ll all just fall into place?  Haven’t felt much physical “work” being done on me, but when I wake up in the morning, I feel a humming energy that is enveloped around my body.  When I open my eyes, I can see it…it resembles water, it’s transparent, and kinda looks like this without the blue color:

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water

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It’s like I’m immersed in an abyss of nothingness just waiting to be created into something….something to create my whole self….only I’m not choosing anything yet.

I remember reading an article about “The Void” space you go into when you die…I tried to find it, but wasn’t able to track it down…wish I could find it so I could include it in this post.  The article said something along the lines of if you can wait and not rush to choose anything right away out of fear, then you would eventually manifest/create the Heavenly realms.  It suggested that when we die, most people panic and are in a state of confusion searching for any “white light” to get out of the darkness and stillness…they search for something familiar to them to find comfort because they are uncomfortable and lonely in the darkness and Peacefulness of the void (basically they are searching for something outside of themselves)…but it said that rushing into that will usually pull them into another reincarnation realm and they’ll start the whole process all over again. I strongly resonate with that article. How can you create Heaven within yourself if you’re always looking for something outside of yourself for comfort?  Patience and detachment are key.  Not searching for anything familiar will allow something new to bloom.  So maybe that’s what I’m doing?

A theme that I also seem to be experiencing right now is two extreme polarities cancelling each other out…really can’t put it into words, but there is some mental work being done on me that involves bringing opposites together and neutralizing them…adding to more of the “blank slate” feeling I’ve been having…I feel that positive and empowering affirmations will be the next step once I’m done with this phase, but will have to be patient and wait until this part is completed.

Well, so far manifesting in everyday life is working for me…like surprisingly quick!  There were 3 things that I really felt strongly (emotionally) over the past few months that should happen, and they all happened last week.  It caught me by surprise and I had to really step back and ask myself “Did I really do that, was it me that manifested that?”  It helped to remind me that I really have to monitor my thoughts and use a lot of discipline when it comes to thinking and feeling while in an emotional state…and I have to keep free will in mind, and take other’s paths into consideration.  That’s even more of a reason to leave Phoenix and move away from my boyfriend. I’ve postponed the move until March because I’m getting a strong message to stay until then.

People are super nice to me, to the point that it’s really weird and I don’t know how to react.  Been feeling a little nudge to get in contact with certain family members again.  Just called one of my cousins and he was SO happy to hear from me, it was so refreshing.  I feel so Loved… Yes, things are definitely changing on a more positive note.  Becoming aware of the power that you have and using it responsibly is a wonderful feeling.  I’ve been trusted with something so delicate and so guarded and protected.  I vow to use it wisely…for the Highest of Good for all :-).

LOVE ❤

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**After writing this post, I found a Karen Bishop post on Feb. 15 that is very helpful in understanding this phase that some of us may be experiencing at the moment:

http://www.gamabooks.com/2.15.2013.html

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**And on Feb. 22nd, I found this post by Maureen Moss:

http://lightworkers.org/channeling/177523/truth-about-your-transformation-which-truth-our-transformation

 

.** I found an article similar to the one I was referring to above.  This one is from Tom Kenyon channeling the Hathors.  In it he says:

As with the other two transition states of consciousness, the death realm has a void point, and its dominant features are stillness (silence) and darkness. All possibilities exist within the Void, but no actuality is in existence. It is like the acorn of an oak tree. The oak, the giant tree itself, is potentially within the acorn, but it does not yet exist.

So when you find yourself in the Void, which you will recognize by the fact that you are utterly alone in darkness and utter stillness, know that you are in the central nexus of your creative powers.

What you choose to create next will determine the course of your destiny and what worlds you will inhabit or realms of existence you will reside in. This is a critical juncture.

Many persons frightened by the darkness move to the light prematurely. And what they do not realize is that in their yearning they create the light. A portal opens before them, like a tunnel, and they can move into this tunnel of light, encountering those they have known before, thereby entering back into embodiment or other vibratory realms of existence without having fully understood the consequences. This is certainly one option open to you, and one that is often taken.

Another option, however, is to remain at the void point, residing in the Void itself, becoming aware of your Self as pure consciousness—transcendent to all phenomena.

If you reside in this state of awareness long enough without the need to create something, you will discover your identity as the great I Am. And from this point of awareness you can choose the circumstances of your embodiment. You can choose the worlds you will inhabit or the realms of consciousness where you will reside.

This latter method gives you the greatest opportunities, though it is the most difficult for most people. And the reason for this difficulty has to do with the fact that most humans find it uncomfortable to not have a body. The yearning for a body and the experience of the material world often draws a person from the Void prematurely.

The whole post can be found here:

http://tomkenyon.com/transition-states-of-consciousness

 

 

It’s 12-12-12 !

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maggietaylor

 

I chose this picture above, because I seem to attract bees when I’m off center and distraught…so today, I’d be wearing a bee dress -LOL

 

I was going to go to Sedona today to meditate and spend some time outdoors but I’m really off center and it’s a long drive to get there…plus my tummy is not feeling well…without going into detail, I’ll just say that my (soon to be “Ex”) boyfriend has, without a doubt, been planted into my life to constantly test my patience, my sanity, and to activate my ulcers! Yesterday was the breaking point and my stomach is in knots as a result of that.

So I did lots of energy clearing techniques this morning while he’s gone to work, to try to help a bit. I was disappointed that I won’t be going to Sedona today…had it all planned out…I would meditate and rest the night before, I’d go to Sedona in the morning, I knew what meditations I would do, what I was going to wear, what stones I was going to take with me, take some cool pictures…blah blah blah….well, it didn’t happen…I quickly corrected any feelings of resentment toward my boyfriend…he is who he is, he doesn’t care about anything Spiritual, I know this, and I’m still here living with him, so it’s nobody’s fault but my own…

It occurred to me that maybe I was putting too much expectation on going to Sedona for 12-12-12 anyway…or even just on the date in general…after all, the Sanctuary is WITHIN…it doesn’t matter where we are on this day…everything’s an illusion…even time…clearly I need to work on myself and clear this junk I’m holding on to and there’s no magical date or geographic location that’s going to do that for me…I must do it myself, within myself…doesn’t matter where I’m at…it’s all about intention.

I went to Starbucks this morning to get an iced pumpkin spice latte (which is my comfort right now). As I was waiting for the coffee, I heard a man that worked there yell out “Ah…FRIGGLE MONKEYS!!!!”….the girl working with him laughed and asked him what in the world he was saying?! He told her that whenever he’s angry, instead of cussing, he’ll say a ridiculous word instead of a curse word…this helps him stay out of anger since he feels silly saying the word. He said it’s been working for him so far…and seeing his coworker laughing, was definitely proof that he was staying out of anger as well as not projecting it on to others.

Hmmm…he’s on to something there…so what would my ridiculous word be? As I was thinking of the most ridiculous word I could use, it reminded me of another time at a Starbucks in the Houston airport. I saw a man (a very manly Cowboy man) point to a cookie and ask what the name of it was. The lady behind the counter told him that it was called a “Snickerdoodle”. The man said “That’s such a STUPID name…who in the world makes up this crap?” He refused to say the word, but told the lady he wanted to buy one… So “Snickerdoodles” it is! That’s my new curse word :-). Who knew that Starbucks would play such an enlightening role in this process – LOL

I found a message from Shekina Rose today which also explained the negativity that’s floating around for the past few days.

The message is here:

http://lightworkers.org/channeling/172905/psychic-attack-planetary-alert-blue-ray-archangel-michael-master-ascension-clearin

 

If I feel better tomorrow, maybe I’ll go to Sedona then…Either way, it’s ok. It doesn’t matter where you are today or any day for that matter. What’s important now and what’s important from now on, is that you stay centered and stay within the Love in your Heart. Forgive those around you that are triggering stress within your life. Whether you realize it or not, you might have been one of those people to someone else, in some point in your life. Whether it’s from this life or from past lives, we may have been the stress source to someone else. I know I sure have been (sorry Grandma 😦 ) Send forgiveness and be done with it. Once you come to terms with it, and you heal and release it, you won’t have to deal with it again. Coming to that realization certainly makes it easier for me to let it go.

Do whatever makes you feel good today (or tonight if you work)…rent some funny movies, take a salt bath, meet a friend for some hot chocolate or a chai latte, make your favorite comfort food…As for me, I’m off to the supermarket…all this talk about Snickerdoodles has put me in the mood to bake some cookies 😉

 

A Shift in Consciousness

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Yesterday was the New Moon Solar Eclipse…I did a few Hindu mantras at night…I just felt the need to do “something”, wasn’t quite sure what, so I was searching on the internet until I found a mantra that caught my attention…the other mantras I did after that, just kinda found me…LOL …they were all basically for obstacle removal or for bringing the obstacle into your awareness so you can heal it. The last one I did, focused on the Sri Yantra Mandala.  As I was doing that one, I just KNEW something profound would happen as a result…I also fell asleep with a copy of the Bhagavad Gita on my bed.  I believe that sacred texts can activate previous states of Higher consciousness that were attained in past lifetimes.

The first time I started to read the Bhaghavad Gita, a very profound experience happened to me…it was my very first experience of turning into liquid form, but that very first time, the sensation scared me and immediately stopped it out of panic.  I didn’t experience that liquid state again until a couple of years later…but that time, I stayed out of fear and was able to merge completely with the element…I was water…I was the sea and I tumbled in with the tide.  It was a very serene and relaxing experience once the fear was gone.

Another example of how sacred texts can awaken previous states of Higher consciousness is from a story a friend told me. He lived in a small town in Puerto Rico at the time.   One day out of the blue, he was drawn to the sacred text “The Vedas” and started to read it out of curiosity…after reading for a few days, he started hearing celestial sounds as a result.  Even when he had stopped reading the book entirely, he was still experiencing this.   His family didn’t understand and wanted him to see a psychiatrist.  Reading the Vedas started his awakening process even though he had never even heard of it before and his family thought it was weird.

So, back to last night… I slept very well, so well, that I don’t even remember my dreams, which is rare for me.  This morning I was taking a shower,  and then BAM! …I was hit with a profound realization of my entire existence, and immediately felt forgiveness for the whole Universe… not even just the whole world, but the entire Universe.  I can’t really put it into words but I realized, like REALLY realized what it meant when they say that we’re EVERYTHING and EVERYONE…I  exist on all timelines, levels, everywhere, everything… ALL of it is an aspect of myself… In that instant, something shifted…

My biggest obstacle up until that point, was not truly understanding this.  Like REALLY understanding it, even beyond a quantum physics level to the point that the understanding is a part of you, not just in your mind, but you can feel it in your Heart , and emanate it from your entire being…feeling it so much, that it made me burst into tears.

I got a rush of information explaining my existence on multiple timelines, growth of a Soul, lessons, and most of all…Unconditional Love & Forgiveness.  How could I hold a grudge, use judgment, or be angry at anyone or anything else, when I realized that they are all an aspect of myself?  They were an aspect of myself that I had already been.  They are what I was, in many lifetimes that it took for me to get where I am now.  Even those which we would label “bad”, are me, were me, before this now moment. There is no need for it to be that way anymore because I understood it.   I was able to understand what all of that meant and was able to forgive the entire Universe.   Huge emotions were building up and I felt a huge release from my core…releasing that which was no longer needed on this journey and understood that I had healed generations of suffering.

Wish I could explain it better.  It’s very difficult to put into words.  I’ll have to say that I’ve been through some pretty strong shifts, but this one was huge.  I didn’t really want to write about it yet, to see how I settle into it, but I wanted to document it.  I wanted to document it while it was still fresh and while I’m still in the feeling.   Since this has been brought to my awareness, I just know that everyone and everything around me will change.  They (we) are free to never be the same 🙂

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Going Through the (E) motions…

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Well, 11-11 came and went…I did an 11.11 meditation video in the morning, from Christine Meleriessee.  Her singing  was kinda funny and made me giggle throughout the video…BUT…even during the funny singing she was doing, I actually felt my Crown chakra swaying and lots of movement in my body.  Laughing is a good thing, it keeps the vibration up :-).  I found the meditation to be very powerful and feel that what needed to be done, was absolutely done without a doubt…Much Gratitude to Christine Meleriessee for providing such a Blessing.

The meditation can be found here:

http://youtu.be/tDtkKQJQMlQ

On 11-11, I did wake up in the morning to see gridlines, but they were just the normal light blue ones.  Also felt myself vibrating extremely hard as I was pulling out of sleep…that intensity was new…  Nothing else happened throughout the day, I was just incredibly tired (sleepy).  I did some grocery shopping during the early afternoon, just going through the motions, and spent the rest of the day in bed resting.  I had no desire to interact with the public.  It’s been very draining this month and my body has been very delicate.  I know it’s just adjusting to the new energies and I honor that.  Lots of rest and staying in bed without the guilt!

My boyfriend seemed mopey and seemed like he was in a grumbling bad mood, so I stayed away from him all day.  He gets like that often.  He was a BIG energy drainer early in the relationship, to the point where I could literally feel his energy hooks or actively draining my solar plexus so much that I could feel the suction.  Some people really don’t know that they’re doing this, so I explained it to him, and he’s SLOWLY stopped doing it over the years.  I don’t mind sharing my energy with others, but sometimes it’s just too much for me to spare…It’s funny, because I felt like a mom teaching a child…I would sternly put up a protection wall around my energy, bring it to his attention, and then tell him to stop.

It took a long while for him to completely stop, but now he’s very moody when he can’t get his energy “fix”….(sigh)  I’ve tried to teach him as much as I can over the last 4 years, but all I can really do is give him the tools to fix himself if he wishes to…it doesn’t seem he’s too interested in working on himself though…we’ve recently mutually  agreed that we’re breaking up and I’m moving back to Los Angeles at the end of December.  I just need to wrap up some stuff in Sedona in December before I leave Phoenix for good…I’m nervous about having to move and come out of seclusion, but in my Heart I know it’s for the best…

I was going to write a little rant here about closed groups in the Spiritual community, separation, and charging money for Divine knowledge, but I deleted it..it’s not important to write about it since it’s something I need to work on within myself.  It wouldn’t bother me, or be brought to my attention if it wasn’t something that I needed to acknowledge and heal.  I’ll just bring awareness to it during this November powerhouse of healing energies and maybe I’ll write about the outcome later.

So 11-11 came and went…now we have the new moon solar eclipse today… some say it’s sort of a balancing of Feminine & Masculine Divine energy to allow the co-existence of both of these elements within your four-body system … all I know is that  I’m a little emotional today.  Cried a little this morning from some past family issues.  That’s new, because lately I haven’t been able to cry for ANYTHING, even if I had wanted to….  I read an email today from Earthkeeper Tyberonn that spoke of the eclipses this month and it explained the sadness.

Here’s part of it explaining the emotions:

“One can expect a much more dramatic feeling to incur. Most of you will be feeling extremely deeply and unexpected emotions, from deeply hidden issues and beliefs may come bubbling up. This allows for a purging of trapped energies you didn’t even know were there. Don’t be surprised if you begin expressing strong opinions about things you didn’t even know before hand were so important to you. It is a time to speak your truth and not allow yourself to be pinned in unfairly by any issue or person.”

Yes, this is a picture of me at the moment…

So there you go, that’s why this hidden stuff is coming up….and I might even be  a little whiney….waaaa…  It seems “petty” the things I’m pondering, but really, it’s something that needs to be addressed within myself and my perception. Just coming up for review…

Let’s see…the rest of November… on 11-22 (22 is a master number) we have a deeper mastery level activation (coupled with all of the Love and Gratitude of Thanksgiving),  and on 11-28 there is the lunar eclipse… another eclipse…Yikes!  I plan to spend the last week of November in bed 😦