Monthly Archives: July 2013

Energy Sensations – Update July 24, 2013



I woke up this morning to the song “Just Another Day” by Oingo Boingo playing in my head.  I never really paid attention to the lyrics, but I looked them up today and they’re pretty interesting…I grew up in L.A. listening to KROQ classic alternative/New Wave, so most songs I hear in my head are from the 80’s.  The original KROQ DJ’s (Richard Blade, Jed the Fish, The Swedish Eagle etc..) are now playing on Sirius/XM radio on channel 33 “The Wave”…It’s amazing how many of those 80’s songs have Spiritual meanings that I never paid attention to or realized until now…



My Heart chakra and High Heart chakra had a huge opening late last night around 11pm.  There was a strong pressure sensation on my chest accompanied by a very strong vibrating on the upper chest (High Heart area).  The vibration was emanating up into my throat and made my throat feel like it was disappearing….also various nerves were twitching in the middle of my chest.  It was a little uncomfortable but only lasted for a few hours.

After I wrote this, I got an update from Gaia Portal today speaking about the High Heart 🙂

The message can be found here:

I was feeling surges of negativity in my Solar Plexus yesterday.  It started the day before, but was amplified yesterday.   I have no idea where it was coming from. I got the feeling that it was coming in so strong at one point and then seemed to be gone once I focused on clearing it out.  Whatever it was, it wasn’t very pleasant, but thankfully didn’t last for very long.  Probably just more clearing and purification…

I’ve also had a very LOUD constant fluctuating ringing in my right ear.  In the past few days, I’ve had a temporary episode (lasted for about a minute) of complete silence take over my right ear, followed by a loud high pitched tone that drowns out all background noise.  This was not subtle at all, it was VERY strong…it made me stop what I was doing and sit down.  It’s happened on different days and only in my right ear.

I was doing a Heart meditation a few times last week and while I was doing the meditation last Tuesday, I had a vision of myself merging with a pregnant woman with a big 9 month belly.  I was seeing and feeling my body melting into her and her belly…all of a sudden my mind became aware of what was happening and I immediately snapped out of it.  I usually panic when I feel the sensation of my body melting or completely turning into liquid and will wake myself up.  It was a very strange experience…and why would I merge with a pregnant woman?  What does that mean?


I also had a lucid dream last Tuesday night, where I saw the honeycomb grid around the Earth which I had never seen before.  When I recently read some sites posting about a honeycomb grid, I just wasn’t resonating with it because it was not something that I had seen or experienced yet.  When I see gridlines, they’re just the regular square or rectangle gridlines.  But in the lucid dream, I saw the honeycomb grid and even said out loud “Wow, I’m finally seeing this grid…it really does exist”…the honeycomb grid I saw was illuminated golden light.

A website that writes about the honeycomb grid can be found here:

I’ve been waking up in the mornings with the strange sensation of my whole body being filled with vibrating molecules…it’s a strange sensation and it takes a while for it to stop once I wake up.  It reminds me of when you get the snow on your television when you lose the connection…I feel like that’s what my energy would look like. I was searching for a picture of a body with molecules in it, and I found this picture below:

Borofsky MoleculeMan

The title of this sculpture is “Molecule Man”…The funny thing about it is that this picture of the sculpture is between the Roybal Building and the Federal building in downtown L.A. and I worked there for many years in the 90’s!  I used to see this sculpture every day… It seems that the visual signs on our path are everywhere; we just may not make sense of them until many years later… 🙂

A description of the sculpture can be found here:

I’ve also been getting flashes in my peripheral vision of my body parts turning into light.  I saw my whole hand light up and also another time I saw part of my arm light up.

Higher chakras are being fine tuned and lots of activity on the Crown, 3rd eye, and temples.  I felt a big liquid blob moving around in my Solar Plexus last week.  It was a very high vibrational energy, whatever it was, because I felt the liquid bliss feeling from it…then it moved to the right side of my face and was moving around my right temple.  I LOVE to feel that type of energy because it feels like a liquid cellular massage of pure Bliss…When I get hit with that energy, I just stop whatever I’m doing and relax so it will take over.  The more I relax and surrender, the stronger it gets and the better it feels.

There’s been so much talk about “Living waters” and “Liquid light” I wonder if that has anything to do with what I’m feeling?  I never really understood what was meant by “Living waters” but that would be a good description of this sensation…Living waters meaning the pure essence of God?  Maybe that’s what the true meaning of being baptized by water means?  It’s something internal, not external…I think I read some Biblical text that spoke of Living waters flowing from the belly.  Could the belly mean the Solar Plexus?  That gives me something to think about…


Scene from the movie “Donnie Darko” :




the moment

I woke up on Monday morning to the word “Fideistic” presented in front of me…I thought for sure that it couldn’t possibly be a real word, but it actually is!  I honestly have never heard of this word before…just looking at it seems like it’s spelled incorrectly…it’s a form of the word “Fideism” – fi′de•ist, n. fi`de•is′tic, adj. 

Fideism: “Fideism” is the name given to that school of thought—to which Tertullian himself is frequently said to have subscribed—which answers that faith is in some sense independent of, if not outright adversarial toward, reason. In contrast to the more rationalistic tradition of natural theology, with its arguments for the existence of God, fideism holds—or at any rate appears to hold (more on this caveat shortly)—that reason is unnecessary and inappropriate for the exercise and justification of religious belief. The term itself derives from fides, the Latin word for faith, and can be rendered literally as faith-ism. “Fideism” is thus to be understood not as a synonym for “religious belief,” but as denoting a particular philosophical account of faith’s appropriate jurisdiction vis-a-vis that of reason.

The whole page can be found here:

I got an email yesterday from an astrology site that I follow.  They were (sarcastically) saying that the Star of David /Merkaba alignment on July 29th was not true and that there was no proof that it was happening.  I wasn’t sure how I felt about that at first, but I came to the conclusion that it’s all due to two things; DIFFERENT TIMELINES – DIFFERENT VIBRATIONS.  Is it right or wrong? No, just different timelines different vibrations…each scenerio is very real in what each individual is choosing to create.


I found a website that explained different timelines in a way that I could understand this.  A quote from this website:

“There is a sense of disorientation in regard to world events, a feeling of walking between worlds, with much of our dreamtime consciousness engaged in building a new world, shaping it with our highest intentions, and outpicturing it into the collective as a timeline of new possibilities. Many of us are engaged, not so much in resisting or attempting to make sense of an old paradigm in its final dance of death, but in visioning the new world rising from the ashes of the old. As we travel deeper into fourth dimensional time, the same events will be experienced very differently in different timelines.” 

The whole article can be found here:

So is this where I apply the word “Fideistic” ?  I guess I have to step back and ask myself “What do you believe in?”   “What are you creating?”  Are they not the same thing? In the long run, I can only go by what my feelings and intuition tells me.  Other people might say that there’s no scientific proof, or outward proof that this is happening, but what do I feel inside?

I’m sure there are millions of people out there that say that there’s no way Reiki can heal a person…but of course, I know that it really does work…I’ve seen many miracles happen with energy healing…and I physically feel the energy coming in at the Crown and pouring out of my hands…In fact, in this last Reiki Tummo workshop I went to last month, there was a huge healing that took place during the class.  A young lady had a back problem for 10 yrs and she said she was in pain every single day.  When we did the group healing on the shushumna (without physically touching her, only channeling the energy to her), she said she physically felt and heard her spine making cracking and popping noises as if it were decompressing.  When she got up from the table and sat down in her chair, she realized her pain was gone.  She broke down and started to cry because she was SO grateful.  I’ve also witnessed rapid healing from Reiki on a pneumonia patient which left the doctor totally baffled by the test results (a friend of mine in a coma in the hospital) and category 4 cervical cancer/lymphoma patient going completely into remission for over 6 years so far ( a family member).

I feel that for this very reason, the word Fideistic was presented to me to remind myself that what I truly believe in, no matter what others might think or say, is what I will create…Letting go of the old way of “thinking” can be very difficult.  That’s why it’s so important to strengthen your inner Heart to “feel” what your brain cannot.








The Blue Rose



I didn’t want to write about this yet because I don’t fully understand it, but I’m getting such a strong feeling about it that I wanted to document it anyway…I just got back from driving from the store and noticed that the car in front of me had a license plate that said “BLUROSE”, so I’ll take that as a confirmation!  So funny when that happens 🙂


In astrology, there is a Grand Sextile alignment that is to take place on July 29, 2013.  I found an article that breaks down the time frame for this alignment here:

I read that this alignment is pretty rare and also read somewhere that the last time it happened like this, was in 1945 around the time WWII ended.  In this alignment, the planets form into the shape of the Star of David, or as other people may identify with, a “Merkaba”.  There are a lot of skeptics out there regarding this alignment, so as with all info on the internet, please use discretion…You may or may not resonate with it, and either way is fine…it is to my understanding that the same events can be experienced differently in different vibrations/timelines and resonance will vary from person to person.  What do you believe in?  What are you creating?


I want to try to explain something that came into my awareness recently, having to do with this alignment, but I’m having a hard time trying to find the words.  That’s been happening to me a lot lately, because I tend to think in pictures or feelings instead of words…but I’ll give it a try…

So…..I was recently reminded of “The Blue Rose” which I first saw years ago in a movie when I was a kid (while visiting my Grandmother’s house for the summer).  The name of the movie is “The Thief of Bagdad”.  There are several versions of the movie out there, but the one I saw was released in 1961 and the star of the movie was Steve Reeves.

The Blue Rose scene from this movie can be found here:

To briefly sum it up, in this movie, a man is on a quest to find a Blue Rose to try to save a Princess.  This Blue Rose is said to be found “beyond the mystical 7 gates”.

I’ve been drawn to blue roses since my childhood and have collected things with blue roses ever since.  The energy of the Blue Rose came into my awareness recently by a feeling that I had.  I associate the Blue Rose with memories of my Grandmother. To me, memories of my Grandmother represent unconditional motherly Love and security which I’ve been feeling a very strong presence of lately.  There’s been a strong feeling of feminine energy, Love and comfort around me for a while now…and it’s weird because in the last week, I’ve had men in public, who are complete strangers, become very protective of me and want to shield me from harm…it’s really bizarre…

 I did some research on the internet as to the meaning of the Blue Rose…this is what I found:

The Blue Rose & the Shoshanayin

“Flowers have long been associated with enlightenment, and as the ancient Egyptians taught about the “Blue Lotus Retreat” – the Esssene tribe taught about “Blue Rose” healing. It is believed that both Mother Mary and Mari Magdalene were members of the Essenes, and that Mari Magdalene called her teachings “The Blue Rose”.  The teaching is to have originated from Venus, and was brought to the earth by Mother Mary. Wherever the Essenes lived,  people referred to them as “Healers”.  The word ‘Essene’ stems from the Aramaic word ‘Assaya’, which means ‘Healer’.  The Essenes were called ‘Therapeutae’, when they were in Egypt, and that is where the word ‘Therapist’ originates from.” 


“This form of healing is associated with Love and Compassion. You may have a dream or a vision of a rose, and the color may tell you which order you belong to, or which Rose you need to learn more about! The Order of the Blue Rose was considered to be a special order for only the most faithful followers of those that followed the path known as The Essene Way.  The Essenes believed that the Christ Ray is carried in both the feminine and masculine, therefore Mari Magdalene was considered to be the feminine Christ.  The Essenes also believed in receiving direct knowledge from God.  They achieved this through what is known as “The Sacred Marriage”.  It is the marriage of the male and female within.” 

The rest of the article can be found here:

Now, when I was reading an article about the Grand Sextile written by Randy Bruner aka “Blue Cosmic Hand” (the article can be found here: )

there was a part of the article that said “On the last day of the 13 moon calendar Cosmic Moon 28, July 24, 2013, the Moon moves into conjunction with Neptune. This adds the power of love from the Super Moon to the power of our highest hopes and dreams from the planet Neptune. This ends out the cycle of the 7 Mystic Moons.”  That immediately made me think of the Blue Rose “7 mystical gates”.  The 7 Mystic Moons are leading up to the Grand Sextile which some are associating with Ascension of the Earth or birth of the new Earth because of the Merkaba formation (As above, So below)…Gaiaportal also had a message about the 777 portal which can be found here:

I’ve been seeing “777” or “77” everywhere (license plates, buildings, etc…) for a few months now and even had $7.77 on my receipt the other day.  I’ve also been sensing and seeing a lot of blue energy around me lately, especially in the last few days and I’m feeling that it may have to do with the Blue Rose.  I see blue orbs and blue flashes around me all day… I do feel like I’m currently anchoring in some of this blue energy and I know I have in the past. I don’t really understand it enough to explain it properly – I apologize….

The Blue Rose, the Essenes, Mother Mary, feminine energy, Mother Earth, Merkaba, birth of the new world, 7 gates/portals…they all tie in together but I just haven’t quite found what I’m looking for to bring them all together.  I’ll write more about it if I can find the words or any new connections…





Picture of blue light captured in Sedona on 12-12-09




Love ❤

Energy Sensations – Update July 8, 2013




I had a dream last night about my step dad.  In the dream, he was actually being a very nice person and we were agreeing with our views about my mother.  It was REALLY strange!  In the dream, he was actually trying to be a good father to my brother and sister, but it was my mom that was making it difficult to raise them properly. This dream was also a big breakthrough in my emotions because I’ve had nightmares about him for so many years. There’s definitely some healing that has taken place and I’m SO GRATEFUL for it 🙂

Also in the dream, there was a male white ferret.  The ferret was speaking to me telepathically and he told me that he felt sick.  I was going to give him some energy healing to make him feel better, but I ended up waking up from the dream.  I looked up the ferret totem on the internet and this is what I found:

“With their eyes that point forward straight down their noses, ferrets are highly focused on what is in front of them. This reminds those with this spirit animal to stay focused on their goals. Ferrets have a fine sense of smell, and can see clearly in the dark, linking them to the underworld. They have sharp intuition and their sensitivity is acute. They are able to see and know the hidden meaning behind everything. The ferret can help you understand yourself, your life, and the experiences you have far clearer. Use all of your senses equally if this is your animal guide. If underdeveloped you may have a leaning toward tunnel vision. An inflexible consciousness makes for needless concern and anxiety, therefore caution is advised. Having a light-hearted attitude and playful activities are helpful.” 

I’ve been SOOOOO ridiculously tired…I don’t think I’ve ever felt this tired in my entire life.  I don’t even have energy to go to the grocery store…In the last 2 weeks I’ve had some painful nerve pinching and twitching going on.  The most painful is the pinching jolting sensation in my big toes. No signs of any purple or bruising on my toes though…I’m surprised that I don’t have any marks on my toes because it’s a pretty strong sensation….so bizarre…  The next painful sensation which I felt for 2 days in a row is what feels like someone is poking my right eye with a needle.  It’s a horrifying feeling that’s random and just suprises me out of nowhere.  It’s happened before periodically on both eyes, but not for 2  days straight…I really don’t like that one at all…

El Collie (who wrote about her Kundalini experience) mentioned the eye poking sensation and toe jolts in an article found here :

I’ve been eating a lot for the past 3 days…it’s like I can’t stop snacking even though I’m not hungry.  I’ve been having trouble eating in the past year (due to complications from a throat surgery), and have lost too much weight, so I’m not complaining!  It’s just strange to want to eat all of a sudden.  I’ve been eating a lot of cereal with almond milk, and have been craving ice cream for some reason.  I usually cut out dairy and have almost completely eliminated sugar, but I have an uncontrollable urge to eat ice cream.  I’m guessing my body needs sugar and carbs right now, for some reason…

As I mentioned above, the painful electrical jolts in my big toes have continued, but now I feel like something is sitting on my left toe.  It’s a weird feeling, but it’s been there for the past 2 days.  When I walk, it flutters whatever it is…  Also random buzzing on my Crown in different locations…it’s not the whole Crown buzzing at once, it’s just small spots about the size of a nickel that start randomly buzzing at different times throughout the day.  When I get heavy Crown downloads, it seems to be only at the back of my head lately, which is something new.  I saw a picture from the Humanity Healing website newsletter and it reminded me of the download sensation I’m having.



The picture was part of an article they wrote on the cerebellum, but I couldn’t access the article since I’m not a paying member of the website (sigh)…but here’s a free article that they were kind enough to let the poor people read – LOL :

Some people consider the cerebellum area the “8th Chakra”, while other people consider the Soul Star chakra (about 6 inches above the Crown) to be the 8th chakra….I personally don’t really care what “number” they attach to a chakra, I just know that I have one there because I can feel it!   but  when different people give different numbers, it just adds to the confusion if they’re only referring to numbers instead of names.  I wonder why there’s such a big difference in what they’re intuitively seeing in these chakras?  Maybe it’s just a difference in vibration (only certain people with certain vibrations to match can see them)? Or maybe some people don’t have certain chakras outside of the 7 major chakras and some do?  I’ve even heard of people ripping their chakras out and removing them completely (Yikes)…definitely not ready for anything like that, but will stay out of judgment 😉

There’s been so much activity on my neck and head lately, I’m thinking that maybe I’ll experience the Kundalini completely rising soon?  It seems to have reached my neck (throat) so far, and then just stops there. It’s been at that point for a while…I’ve heard that once it penetrates the 3rd eye, it will reach the Crown shortly after…I’ve been having constant work done on my 3rd eye and continuous Crown activity lately, so maybe it’ll be soon…When the “core” Kundalini rises, I can feel the hot liquid feeling slowly slithering up my spine.  When it happens, I picture in my mind the mercury in a thermometer, so I associate the core Kundalini with silver liquid.

From what I’ve read, when the Kundalini finishes the purification process and reaches the Crown, there’s this profound Ecstasy Blissful life changing event that takes place. It’s been explained as “Illumination” that other people can actually see… Will that happen for me?  Uh…probably not… the reason I say that is because for the most part,  my experience has been pretty tame…but maybe I’m wrong, maybe I will experience this Illumination that they speak of.

That would be pretty cool and it’s a welcomed experience.  I just hope I’m not standing in the checkout line in a store or sitting on the toilet or something…that would definitely take away from my illumination experience…but the way my life’s been going and the twisted sense of humor that my “future self” seems to have, anything’s possible…a toilet bowl enlightenment may just very well be in my future… LOL